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I trhought you were my wife ! 1/13/2020
A man drunk as a skunk walked into a bar and, after staring
for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked
over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling
her.
She jumped up and slapped him silly.
He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm
sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like
her."
"Why you drunken, worthless, ...
13 Comments, 256 Views,
34 Votes
,5.04 Score
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|
The dog ! 6/17/2021
A man walks into a bar with his and orders two glasses
of whiskey. He proposes a toast and both he and his empty
their glasses. The girl behind the bar is surprised and
asks, "Can your perform other tricks?"
"But of course, " the man answers, "he
can even gratify a woman."
Anxious to know more the girl leads the man and the into
a little room above the bar. She undresses and ...
12 Comments, 285 Views,
39 Votes
,7.14 Score
|
|
Lawyer Cross-Examines a Cop 6/23/2021
A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer
during a felony trial. It went like this:
Q. Officer, did you see my fleeing the scene?
A. No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching
the description of the offender running several blocks
away.
Q. Officer, who provided this description?
A. The officer who responded to the scene.
Q. ...
7 Comments, 183 Views,
28 Votes
,4.78 Score
|
|
a called sex 6/23/2021
Everybody I know who has a usually calls him "Rover"
or "Spot".
I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me.
When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license,
I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex.
He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then
I said, "But she is a dog!"
He said he didn't care what she looked like. I said,
"You don't ...
6 Comments, 322 Views,
17 Votes
,2.56 Score
|
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A southern mama ! 6/10/2021
A young southern girl of 13 was hearing a lot of new words
pertaining to sex at school that she didn't understand
at all. She decided to ask her divorced, single beautiful
30 year old southern blonde headed mom about it bluntly.
The told her mom the at school were saying
things about going down on one another and that she didn't
understand it at all. She asked her mom, "Will you ...
6 Comments, 255 Views,
28 Votes
,6.94 Score
|
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Not The Best Example 6/3/2021
One day two very loving parents got into a huge fight, the
man called the women a "bitch" and the women
called the man a "bastard".
Their walked in and said "What does bitch and bastard
mean?" and the parents replied "ladies and
gentlemen".
The next day the parents decided to have sex, the women said
"feel my titties" and the man said "feel
my dick".
Their walked in ...
5 Comments, 145 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
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TOO MUCH TO DRINK 2/13/2020
After sitting at the bar all afternoon and drinking way
too much, the bartender told him that he could not serve
him anymore. After a brief rebuttal the man reluctantly
left. A short time later the man came in the back door and
seated himself at the bar. Quickly the bartender came down
and told him, No more for you. I told you that you must leave.
Once more after a brief argument the man left. It ...
5 Comments, 176 Views,
11 Votes
,4.29 Score
|
|
points 2/4/2020
whats the hardest thing on this site? getting
5 Comments, 38 Views,
11 Votes
,0.92 Score
|
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HAHA 11/6/2019
Truth is something that seems to elude people when describing
themselves in their profiles. I find it a particularly
"dark" place when confronted with having to
deal with someone's lies, half-truths or misinformation.
I would like to take an opportunity now to shed some "light"
on the topic in this article as a form of advice. **********Be truthful********* How ...
5 Comments, 56 Views,
21 Votes
,1.64 Score
|
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little boy 6/29/2021
“A little boy and his friends are being called bastards
and bitches by bullies at school. The boy goes home and asks,
"Dad, what are bastards and bitches?" And his
dad replies, "Bitches are ladies and bastards are
gentlemen." Then the boy goes upstairs to see his
mom. As he enters the room, he accidentally drops a perfume
bottle, and his mom says, "Shit!" "Mom,
what is shit?" and she says, ...
4 Comments, 134 Views,
13 Votes
,5.32 Score
|
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, you got to love em 6/12/2021
A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a
cat, but it was dead.
"How do you know the cat as dead?" she asked him.
"Because i pissed in it's ear and it didn't
move, " answered the innocently.
"You did WHAT!!" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.
"You know, " explained the boy, "i leant
over and went 'Pssst', and it didn't move."
4 Comments, 232 Views,
11 Votes
,5.22 Score
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parachute school 3/9/2020
a man comes home from army parachute . his friends
all asked if he made and jumps yet and he said sure have. they
asked if it was hard to jump that first time. he said it was very much. said he drifting farther and farther
to the back of the line. then at last it was just him and a giant
of a sgt. he yelled for me to jump and I just stood there shaking.
he then said if I didnt jump he was going ...
4 Comments, 250 Views,
14 Votes
,5.86 Score
|
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upset blonde 1/24/2020
sat next a blonde at the bar, she was sobbing , i ask why
she was sobbing she said she had 3 sister but her brother had 4!
4 Comments, 51 Views,
10 Votes
,1.19 Score
|
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Standard member 12/5/2019
magazine article
4 Comments, 24 Views,
12 Votes
,2.09 Score
|
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Knock knock 11/30/2019
Points
4 Comments, 10 Views,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
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sex 9/21/2019
hell yes very
4 Comments, 26 Views,
15 Votes
,0.53 Score
|
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More Humour 9/8/2019
A drunken Irishman is driving through the city of Dublin and his car is weaving violently all over the road.
A cop pulls him over. "So, " says the cop to the driver, "where
have you been?" "I've been to the pub, " slurs the drunk.
"Well, " says the cop, "it looks like
you've had quite a few." "I did all right, " the drunk says ...
4 Comments, 64 Views,
13 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
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Classic mistake 8/5/2019
A guy walks into his home with chicken under his arm. His
wife is standing there. <br><br>
Man says “Well this is the pig I’m fucking.” Wife says “Honey, that’s not a pig under your arm. It’s
a chicken.” Man says “I wasn’t talking to you.”
4 Comments, 22 Views,
12 Votes
,3.51 Score
|
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Dentist issues 8/5/2019
An old woman walked into a dentist’s office, took off
all her clothes, and spread her legs. The dentist said,
”I think you have the wrong room.” <br><br>
”You put in my husband’s teeth last week, ” she replied.
“Now you have to remove them.”
4 Comments, 27 Views,
11 Votes
,3.54 Score
|
|
Really? 7/30/2019
The shit people do for points...lol
4 Comments, 21 Views,
13 Votes
,2.81 Score
|
|
ponts 7/29/2019
points points points points points points points points
points points.
4 Comments, 18 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
|
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muff diving 7/27/2019
whats going to court and muff diving got in common...1 slip
of the tongue and your in the shit
4 Comments, 28 Views,
18 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
Guess what? 7/24/2019
The IM change is the site's worth joke.
4 Comments, 21 Views,
13 Votes
,5.16 Score
|
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Morning Wood 6/18/2019
John woke up one morning immensely aroused so he turned
over to his wife’s side of the bed. His wife, Heather,
had already awakened though, and she was downstairs preparing
breakfast in the kitchen. <br><br>
Afraid that he might spoil things by getting up, John called
his little into he room and asked him to take this note
to your beautiful mommy. The note read: ...
4 Comments, 58 Views,
8 Votes
,2.32 Score
|
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Knock knock 5/27/2019
Who’s there?
4 Comments, 43 Views,
14 Votes
,0.58 Score
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Smart Ass ! 6/25/2021
There was this guy who was in love with his wife but his job
took up a lot of his time. One Sunday afternoon, his wife
came home and said the boys were out playing, and maybe they
should do some playing of their own. The man thought about this and decided she was right. He embraced her and they began to kiss passionately. She
felt him getting hard and said he'd best be getting
that condom on and ...
3 Comments, 125 Views,
7 Votes
,4.06 Score
|
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When 6/24/2021
Judge asked , "So when did you realize
you were ?"
replied, wiping her tears, "When the
check bounced."
3 Comments, 132 Views,
6 Votes
,2.80 Score
|
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Farah Fawcett at the Pearly Gates 6/15/2021
After Farah Fawcett died, she was met by St. Peter at the
Pearly Gates.
"Ah, weren't you one of Charlies Angels?"
he says with a twinkle in his eyes.
"Why, yes, I was". Farah replied.
"Well then, we don't get too many high calibre
celebrities up HERE, so before you enter the Pearly Gates,
I am authorized to grant you one wish!"
Farah ponders this for some ...
3 Comments, 135 Views,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
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How interesting are the answers 6/11/2021
1stgrade school teacher had twenty-six students in her
class. She presented each in her classroom the 1st
half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with
the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe
these were actually done by first graders. Their insight
may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these
are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one
is a ...
3 Comments, 122 Views,
5 Votes
,4.77 Score
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's Science Exam 6/9/2021
's Science Exam
If you need a good laugh, try reading through these 's science exam answers...
Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is ...
3 Comments, 138 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
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Speeding Ticket 11/26/2020
A man was driving down a dark road one evening. It was late
and there were no other cars on the road. He decided to see
how fast his car would go. As he mashed the accelerator he
felt the car lurch forward with power. As he got up to 90mph
he passed under a bridge. Before long there were red and
blue lights in his rearview, so the man pulls over and gets
all his legal documents together. The ...
3 Comments, 166 Views,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
|
|
Physics 4/7/2020
A neutron walks into a bar and asks. How much for a beer? The
bartender says...for you, no charge.
3 Comments, 28 Views,
7 Votes
,4.82 Score
|
|
little girls....... 2/23/2020
why do little girls their eyes in the morning? <br><br>
because they dont have balls to scratch
3 Comments, 43 Views,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score
|
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Christmas 1/14/2020
A few months after his parents were divorced, little Johnny
passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her
body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!"
Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several
times. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning.
When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her.
Little Johnny ran into his room, took ...
3 Comments, 107 Views,
9 Votes
,3.00 Score
|
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Squirting in self defense 1/11/2020
can squirting be taught as self defense
3 Comments, 16 Views,
6 Votes
,3.93 Score
|
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how many fucks can a wood chuck fuck? 1/4/2020
about 1 or 2 id guess.
3 Comments, 11 Views,
6 Votes
,1.66 Score
|
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Xmas classic joke 12/17/2019
What is the difference between a snowman & a snow woman?
...
3 Comments, 58 Views,
16 Votes
,2.69 Score
|
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Hilarious 12/7/2019
I asked the wife why she married me. She said "It's
'cos you are so funny". I said, "Oh, I thought
it was 'cos I was great in bed". "See"
she replied, "You're fuckin hilarious"......
3 Comments, 40 Views,
22 Votes
,3.49 Score
|
|
Best pick up line? 10/25/2019
Comment your best pickup line?
3 Comments, 11 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
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How do you know when your best best friend is vegan? 10/10/2019
Don't worry he will tell you.
3 Comments, 21 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
|
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Senior Briefing 9/27/2019
On the first day at the new seniors complex, the manager
addressed all the new seniors pointing out some of the rules:
<br><br>
"The female sleeping quarters will be out-of-bounds
for all males, and the male dormitory to the females. Anybody
caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time."
<br><br>
He continued, "Anybody caught breaking this ...
3 Comments, 42 Views,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score
|
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More Humour 9/2/2019
Dave woke up after the annual office Christmas party with
a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly unable
to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs,
where his old lady put some coffee in front of him. “Louise, ” he moaned, “tell me what happened last
night. Was it as bad as I think?” “Even worse, ” she said, her ...
3 Comments, 53 Views,
10 Votes
,4.98 Score
|
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More Humour 8/26/2019
One the first teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her . She came to the part of the story where the first was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read, "...and
so the went up to the man with the wheel barrow full of straw and said, "Pardon sir, but may I have some of straw to build my house?" The teacher paused
then asked the ...
3 Comments, 52 Views,
11 Votes
,3.73 Score
|
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Humour 8/10/2019
3 Irishmen in a bar. Murphy says "My local's better
than this. In my local, you 2 drinks and the 3rd's
free" Mick says, "Well in my local you 1 drink
you get the 2nd free" Paddy says, "That's nothin'.
In my local you the 1st drink, then the 2nd, 3rd, 4th,
5th, 6th & 7th are free. Then you go to the back and get a shag.
"WOW, " says the ...
3 Comments, 50 Views,
12 Votes
,4.57 Score
|
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The Bug 8/4/2019
A man and a woman were driving down the road arguing about
his infidelity, when suddenly the woman reached over and
cut the man's penis off and tossed it out the window.
<br><br>
Driving behind the couple was a man and his 8-year-old .
The girl was chatting away to her father when all of a sudden
the penis splattered into their car windshield, stuck
for a moment, then disappeared ...
3 Comments, 93 Views,
19 Votes
,5.23 Score
|
|
How to get the most points. 7/14/2019
Just curious if there is a better way get points when you
need them?
3 Comments, 17 Views,
12 Votes
,3.51 Score
|
|
What happend to the jokes? 6/6/2019
Jokes used to be amazing but seems like in our day of tech
and social media it has died.
3 Comments, 21 Views,
12 Votes
,2.80 Score
|
|
What kinksters say and what vanillas hear 5/31/2019
What kinksters say: "Are you kinky?" What vanillas hear: "Do you like anal?" <br><br>
What kinksters say: "I polyamorous" What vanillas hear: "I just haven't met the right person yet."
<br><br>
What kinksters say: "I am bi-sexual" What vanillas hear: "I am gay, I just don't want to admit it" ...
3 Comments, 48 Views,
15 Votes
,1.91 Score
|
|
Flakes and Points 5/30/2019
Rule #87 watch out for flakes <br><br>
I swear this site keeps taking points away eliminating
chances to start conversations. This site is 100% built
to trick you into buying points...no thanks.
3 Comments, 16 Views,
11 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
Two Irish Nuns 5/16/2019
Two Irish Nuns visit New York City for the first time. Walking
through Times Square, they see a street vendor with a sign
" DOGS". <br><br>
"Look , sister, " says one of the nuns.
"They eat here in America." <br><br>
"We must try it, " says the other nun, "to
experience what it's like to be here in America." ...
3 Comments, 89 Views,
25 Votes
,2.14 Score
|
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Back from Iraq 5/3/2019
A buddy of mine got back from Iraq, third tour as a marine.
They really do use camels as the main means of transportation.
They have to take a camel driving test, they give on mon., wed.
and fri. They have sex education on tues, and thurs. <br><br>
<br><br>
I ask him why and he said they don't want to wear the camel
out!!!
3 Comments, 43 Views,
14 Votes
,2.98 Score
|
|
Checking out the bar 4/23/2019
A guy is on a business trip. He sees a bar across the street
from his hotel. Entering the bar, he sees a sign on the wall.
It reads: Cheese sandwich $2.50; Ham sandwich $4.50; Hand
Job $10. <br><br>
Behind the bar are three beautiful women. He motions for
one to over. <br><br>
"Sweetie, " he says, "are you one of the
women who gives hand jobs?" ...
3 Comments, 68 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
|
|
Three cheesy jokes that we all know and love.... 6/25/2021
1) If you have sex with a person without their consent, it
is called ....so if you have sex with a without
her consent, is it called , or shoplifting?
2) What kind of pleasure does a Priest get? ANSWER: Nun
3) If you have sex with someone and get a disease, you are
said to have an STD.....so if you jerk off to massive amounts
of porn on your computer and your ...
2 Comments, 77 Views,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
code 6/24/2021
A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code"
to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting
their in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter.
<br>
One day the husband told his five year old , "Go
tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter".
<br>
The told her mother what her dad said, and her mom responded,
"Tell your daddy that he ...
2 Comments, 226 Views,
13 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
Cute 6/23/2021
A NAMED SEX
Everybody I know who has a usually calls him "Rover"
or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been
very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew
the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like
a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one
too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He
said he didn't care what she looked like. I said, "You
don't ...
2 Comments, 129 Views,
6 Votes
,4.50 Score
|
|
AND YOU EXPECTED WHAT? 6/22/2021
When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk's hand was bandaged, but before
he could ask about the bandage, the clerk had some very good news for him.
"Guess what, sir?" the clerk said. "I
finally sold that terrible, ugly suit we've had so long!"
"Do you mean that repulsive pink-and-blue double-breasted thing?!" the manager asked.
"That's the one!" ...
2 Comments, 137 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
A Must Read! 6/22/2021
To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator
door - nose height.
Dear Dogs and Cats, The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your
food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note,
placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim
for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically
pleasing in the ...
2 Comments, 121 Views,
7 Votes
,5.59 Score
|
|
spelling b!! 6/19/2021
A guy was driving down the highway with his smokin'
hot blonde girlfriend and she said to him, 'I think those people in the car next to us are from another
country. 'Why is that?' he said. 'Well, the are writing on the window and it says,
...'stit ruoy su wohs 
2 Comments, 71 Views,
5 Votes
,5.75 Score
|
|
Jewish Divorce 6/18/2021
A Jewish says to her mother, "I'm divorcing
Nathan. All he wants is sex, sex and more sex. My vagina is
now the size of a 50-cent piece, when it used to be the size
of a 5-cent piece."
Her mother says, "You're married to a multi-millionaire
businessman! You live in an 8-bedroom mansion! You drive
a $250, 000 Ferrari! You get $2, 000 a week allowance!
You take 6 vacations a year and ...
2 Comments, 195 Views,
11 Votes
,5.41 Score
|
|
family 6/17/2021
this guy tells his father that he just got engaged to
audrey from across the street.
<br>
please wish me well.
<br>
the father tells his that, sorry, but i had an affair
with audrey and it wouldnt be right for you to marry her.
<br>
so the breaks off the engagement and is devastated.
<br>
as time goes by he gets engaged to another girl, susan. ...
2 Comments, 405 Views,
13 Votes
,2.81 Score
|
|
What his wife's name was... 6/16/2021
A man asked an American Indian what his wife's name
was...
He replied, "She is called Four ."
The man said, "That's an unusual name for your
wife. What does it mean?"
The Old Indian answered, "It is an old Indian Name.
It means....
Nag ...... nag ...... nag ...... nag
2 Comments, 150 Views,
9 Votes
,3.21 Score
|
|
Dildo and cocks!! 6/16/2021
This story is not worthy of the advice line, but some may
find it funny.. It reminded me as the last few days on the
advice line has been about cocks and dildos..It reminded
me of a situation my girlfreind told me about...Her husband
and her were getting ready for work, there 5 yr old went
in the parents bedroom while daddy was getting coffee and
mummy was in the bathroom..Well he todled into ...
2 Comments, 242 Views,
14 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
Shipwreck 6/10/2021
A man was washed up on a beach after a terrible shipwreck.
Only a sheep and a sheepdog were washed up with him. After
looking around, he realized that they were stranded on
a deserted island.
After being there awhile, he got into the habit of taking
his two animal companions to the beach every evening to
watch the sunset.
One particular evening, the sky was a fiery red with ...
2 Comments, 119 Views,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score
|
|
Funniest Joke In The World 6/9/2021
The Father walks into his sons room and says:
", I've told you a thousand times not to do
that or you'll go blind." The says:
"Dad, I'm over here."
2 Comments, 375 Views,
19 Votes
,4.44 Score
|
|
Caught in the Act! 6/9/2021
A woman takes a lover home
during the day while her Husband is at work.
Her 9 year old comes home unexpectedly, sees them, and hides in the Bedroom cupboard to watch.
Just after getting into bed the woman's husband also
comes home.
She puts her lover in the cupboard, not realising that the
little boy is in there ...
2 Comments, 139 Views,
8 Votes
,4.17 Score
|
|
Just for points, that all 1/22/2021
Just for , that all
2 Comments, 11 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
blonde wife 9/22/2020
One winter morning in Syracuse a husband and his blonde
wife were listening to the radio during breakfast. They
heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to
inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered
side of the street, so the snowplows can get through...
So the good wife went and moved her car. <br><br>
<br><br>
A week later while they ...
2 Comments, 188 Views,
7 Votes
,5.08 Score
|
|
What Time Is It? 9/2/2020
Adam and his wife were taking a walk in the desert, just outside
a city, to pass time. After having walked a little while,
the couple wanted to check the time, out of curiosity, but
Adam had forgotten his wristwatch back at the hotel. <br><br>
They noticed a frail old man, sitting by his donkey in the
hot sand, about a hundred meters away, and decided to ask
him. "Excuse me sir, ...
2 Comments, 113 Views,
4 Votes
,4.41 Score
|
|
Addiction 4/19/2020
I used to be addicted to the HOKEY POKEY..............but
I turned myself around.
2 Comments, 26 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
people in a bar / Club 3/24/2020
in a club / bar / on this site ... ALL people.... LGBT ++ . Straight
. BI. ... Single / married are like shots of alcohol .. <br><br>
. Everyone is looking for the best ... { LICKER } Liqueur .
 >>! happym; happyf;
2 Comments, 18 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
|
|
Storm Dennis 2/16/2020
I wouldn't say it's windy today but my wheelie
bin has been sent for a speed awareness course on Tuesday
2 Comments, 17 Views,
4 Votes
,4.41 Score
|
|
Husband bring home flowers. 2/9/2020
A husband coming home with a dozen roses for his wife. She
says "I guess I you want me to open my legs now."
He replies "Don't you have a vase?"
2 Comments, 25 Views,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
|
girl scouts 1/24/2020
What is the difference between a girl scout and a pigmy?
<br><br>
A pigmy is a cunning little runt. A girl scout is a running
little ?
2 Comments, 35 Views,
12 Votes
,2.62 Score
|
|
test jokers 1/22/2020
point rewards test
2 Comments, 11 Views,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score
|
|
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 1/20/2020
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmxxxxxxxxxxx
2 Comments, 16 Views,
8 Votes
,0.47 Score
|
|
Funny 1/15/2020
A man and a woman started have in the middle of a dark
forest. After about minutes, the man finally gets up
and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!"
The woman says, " too, you've been eating grass
for the past minutes!"
2 Comments, 31 Views,
13 Votes
,2.30 Score
|
|
A Joke 1/2/2020
I was accused of getting some on the side. I said it has been
so long since I had any. I didn't know they had moved
it.
2 Comments, 18 Views,
8 Votes
,2.09 Score
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Jelly and Jam 12/31/2019
What is difference between jelly and jam? <br><br>
Answer: You cant jelly a cock down someone's throat.
2 Comments, 15 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
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What’s harder 12/29/2019
Lol so what’s harder to get points or pussy 😂😂😂🤦🏿♂️
2 Comments, 23 Views,
13 Votes
,3.98 Score
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I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger 12/4/2019
Then it hit me
2 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,2.16 Score
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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? 11/28/2019
Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.
2 Comments, 11 Views,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
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Old but still good 11/18/2019
Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she
earned $20 by climbing a tree. Her mom responded, "Maria,
they just wanted to see your panties!" Maria replied,
"See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!"
2 Comments, 23 Views,
11 Votes
,3.92 Score
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A Blonde Joke 11/18/2019
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar
by mistake... he finds his way to a bar stool and orders a
shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he
yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde
joke?' <br><br>
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. <br><br>
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before ...
2 Comments, 55 Views,
7 Votes
,4.06 Score
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points 11/5/2019
points points points points points points points points
points points
2 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
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old testament 11/4/2019
How does Moses make tea? He brews.
2 Comments, 14 Views,
9 Votes
,2.14 Score
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Here's the pussy 10/26/2019
Best pussy ever
2 Comments, 5 Views,
2 Votes
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And the hits keep rolling on 10/24/2019
The wife came up me yesterday asking for some for
some new shoes.Of course, i said no and, she went off in
a right huff.Last night, feeling somewhat randy, i cuddled
up her in bed.She said, "You can get stuffed.If
you cant shoe the , you sure arent fucking riding
it"
2 Comments, 24 Views,
10 Votes
,2.99 Score
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points 10/16/2019
we all need points so bad this new IM what a joke
2 Comments, 12 Views,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
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Knock 10/16/2019
Knock knock <br><br>
Who's there <br><br>
Justin <br><br>
Justin Who <br><br>
Justin in time to get some points.
2 Comments, 10 Views,
5 Votes
,1.51 Score
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Points 10/12/2019
There's no point in this.
2 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
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Hi how is everyone doing 10/7/2019
So there a nun and a blind man. The nun gose to her room and
gets in the shower then hears a knock at the door says who
is it the. Man replied the blind man she says okay if your
blind come in so he dose and says nice tits now we're
do you want your blinds
2 Comments, 16 Views,
7 Votes
,1.00 Score
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What do you call a herd of cows masturbating? 10/1/2019
Beef strokin’ off. <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
... I'll see myself out.
2 Comments, 8 Views,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
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The points :) 9/26/2019
Just making this article for the points yall sry bout that
2 Comments, 8 Views,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
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points 9/24/2019
points points points points points points.
2 Comments, 11 Views,
7 Votes
,1.77 Score
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Monday blues 9/20/2019
Blue blues
2 Comments, 25 Views,
19 Votes
,2.07 Score
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A Joke 9/20/2019
Justin Trudeau was reportedly very excited to be asked
to address a conference on racism. <br><br>
Apparently he's totally made up
2 Comments, 29 Views,
12 Votes
,1.56 Score
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Thomas Edison 9/16/2019
Thomas Edison was probably the first guy to fuck a girl with
the lights on.
2 Comments, 19 Views,
16 Votes
,1.95 Score
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More Humour 9/16/2019
Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine
. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When
the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife
and the nine are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while,
the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of
the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, ...
2 Comments, 58 Views,
15 Votes
,3.74 Score
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points 9/16/2019
points points points points points points.
2 Comments, 10 Views,
6 Votes
,1.37 Score
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Hotel porn 9/10/2019
A family walks into a hotel and he father goes to the front
desk to get a room. He says "I hope the porn is disabled".
The guy at the desk says "We just show regular porn
you sick fuck".
2 Comments, 19 Views,
12 Votes
,2.62 Score
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Is the Earth really round ????? 9/9/2019
NASA lied us !!
2 Comments, 19 Views,
10 Votes
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Threesome 9/9/2019
Having just passed my 50th birthday, I met an older woman
in a bar the other night. She was in her late 60s, but in very
good shape for her age. We got talking and flirting and she
asked if I'd like to go back to hers for a "sportsman's
double". "What's that ?" I said.
"It's a mother and threesome".
Imagining a gorgeous lady about my age, I ...
2 Comments, 36 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
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The biggest Vagina 9/7/2019
Three women are sitting at a bar arguing over who has the
biggest vagina. <br><br>
“The first girl says, ‘My boyfriend can fit a whole
fist up there.’ The second girl says, ‘Ha, my boyfriend
can fit two fists and a foot.’ The third girl just smiles
as she slides down the bar stool.”
2 Comments, 36 Views,
14 Votes
,1.70 Score
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What in the difference- 9/2/2019
Between a lollipop and a sucker?
2 Comments, 23 Views,
3 Votes
,0.49 Score
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funny guy 8/30/2019
I have been writing volumes of jokes my entire life, now
at the age of 61 I've been sifting through my writings,
im a funny guy.
2 Comments, 19 Views,
6 Votes
,1.37 Score
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joke #1 8/14/2019
<br><br>
?
2 Comments, 14 Views,
6 Votes
,4.22 Score
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Humour 8/10/2019
My german girlfriend likes to my sexual performances
on a scale of 1-. Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling
9. That's the best I've ever done....
2 Comments, 24 Views,
5 Votes
,4.45 Score
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Why did the chicken cross the road.. 8/8/2019
Im sure he needed points!
2 Comments, 9 Views,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
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Lol 7/25/2019
This site is a joke
2 Comments, 12 Views,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
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points 7/23/2019
so little points so little time...
2 Comments, 14 Views,
10 Votes
,3.19 Score
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Pointy points? 7/21/2019
Pointy points! <br><br>
That's the joke cause I need em
2 Comments, 17 Views,
11 Votes
,1.48 Score
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oh ms Jamaica 6/28/2019
A ’s most important Organ supposedly as described
by some of the most beautiful women of the world at the Miss
Universe Contest. <br><br>
INDIA <br><br>
Question: Ms India, how do you describe a Organ in your
country? <br><br>
Ms India: Well, I can say that Organs in India are like
labourers. <br><br>
Question: How can you say so? ...
2 Comments, 42 Views,
10 Votes
,2.79 Score
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Knock Knock 6/16/2019
Whos there
2 Comments, 13 Views,
6 Votes
,0.80 Score
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What did the penis say to the vagina? 6/6/2019
Cover , going in!
2 Comments, 19 Views,
11 Votes
,1.67 Score
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Larger breasts please 6/5/2019
A woman asked her Dr. about breast enhancement. She claimed
that when she was younger men seemed to prefer women w/ smaller
breasts, but today's man prefers larger breasts.
Is there anything you can do? Why sure the Dr. replied. there
are implants for that purpose. A simple surgery and you're
now carrying larger breasts. NO! no surgery there must
be another way, something other than ...
2 Comments, 70 Views,
10 Votes
,2.79 Score
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Knock Knock 5/12/2019
What up, <br><br>
My cock. <br><br>
8========D~~ (. )( .)
2 Comments, 26 Views,
17 Votes
,0.44 Score
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Puns 5/11/2019
1.The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table
was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
<br><br>
2.I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but
it turned out to be an optical Aleutian . <br><br>
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. <br><br>
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, ...
2 Comments, 43 Views,
15 Votes
,3.13 Score
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So there I was 5/3/2019
So, there I was..... Balls deep; and my sister stops, turns and says "Wow,
you know what? You are as big as Dad!" I was surprised, and replied "You know, that's
the same thing Mom said."
2 Comments, 29 Views,
13 Votes
,3.14 Score
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Saturday fun 4/20/2019
I just picked up a new book, "the history of lubricants",
its non friction
2 Comments, 9 Views,
4 Votes
,4.02 Score
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Chinese Medicine 4/19/2019
While in China, an American man is sexually promiscuous
and does not use a condom the entire time he is there. <br><br>
A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one
morning to find his penis covered with bright green and
purple spots. <br><br>
Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. <br><br>
The doctor, never having seen anything like ...
2 Comments, 71 Views,
7 Votes
,3.80 Score
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Just for points 11/21/2021
👍
1 Comments, 14 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
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Mensa Question 6/29/2021
You are on a , galloping at a constant speed.
On your right side is a sharp drop off.
And on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same
speed as you.
Directly in front of you is another galloping but
your is unable to overtake it.
Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the
in front of you.
What must you do to safely get ...
1 Comments, 131 Views,
7 Votes
,3.80 Score
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Dumbest 6/26/2021
As a young boy enters a barber shop the barber whispers to
his customer's. This is the dumbest in the world. Watch while I prove
it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters
in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which
do you want, ?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That
never learns!" ...
1 Comments, 137 Views,
5 Votes
,3.47 Score
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RETIRED 6/25/2021
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on
her trips to Target.
Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring
and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate,
my wife is like most women - she loves to browse, so I had to
learn to while away my time.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from
the local Target:
Dear Mrs. ...
1 Comments, 130 Views,
4 Votes
,4.80 Score
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Dark Closet 6/25/2021
A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover
comes over, she
puts her nine year old in the closet. One day the woman
hears a car in
the driveway and puts her lover in the closet as well.
<br>
Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's
dark in here, isn't it?"
"Yes, it is, " the man replies.
"You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks.
"No thanks, " the man ...
1 Comments, 199 Views,
11 Votes
,2.79 Score
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A Slighty Confused 6/24/2021
A comes home from school and asks her mother "Is
it true what Rita just told me? Babies come out of the same
place where boys put their dicks?" "Yes, dear" replies her mother, pleased that
the subject had finally come up and she wouldn't have
to explain it to her . "But then when I have a baby, " responded the
"won't it knock my teeth out?"
1 Comments, 184 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
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Take Your Choice 6/23/2021
A husband, one bright sunny morning, turns to his lovely
wife, "Wife, we're going fishing this weekend,
you, me and the dog." The wife grimaces, "But I don't like fishing!"
"Look! We're going fishing and that's final."
"Do I have to go fishing with you... I really don't
want to go!" "Right I'll give you three choices... 1 You come
fishing with me and the dog... 2 You give me a BLOW JOB....
3 or ...
1 Comments, 184 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score
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Dogs at the Vets 6/22/2021
Two dogs at the vets. 1st says to the other dog 'What
you here for?' 2nd says 'I keep rubbing myself
up my owners leg so he's having my balls cut off'.
'Ooch' says the first dog. 2nd says 'What
you here for then?'. 1st says 'Look at my owner
she's beautiful, perfect beasts, a tight arse, abosolutely
fabulous. Well she was bending over cleaning the oven ...
1 Comments, 49 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
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The brilliance of little 6/10/2021
A little boy ask his mom how old she was and she said women
don't tell their age, then he ask how much she weighed
and she said we don't tell that either, so then the little
boy ask her why her and his daddy got a divorce and she said
that she couldn’t tell him.
<br>
A few days later the boy was looking at is moms drivers license
and told his mom " I know how old you are" ...
1 Comments, 184 Views,
15 Votes
,5.73 Score
|
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SIREN 6/10/2021
A fireman was at the station house when he noticed a little
girl next door. She was in a little red wagon with little
ladders hanging off the side.
She was wearing a fireman's hat and had the wagon tied
to a dog.
The fireman asked her, "Hey little girl. What are
you doing?"
She said, "I'm pretending to be a fireman and
this is my fire truck."
The fireman walked ...
1 Comments, 139 Views,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
|
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little johnny 6/9/2021
Little Johnny likes to gamble.
One day his dad gets a new job so his family has to move to a
new city.
Johnny's daddy thinks, "I'll get a head
start on Johnny's gambling."
So he calls the teacher and says, "My Johnny will
be starting your class tomorrow but he likes to gamble so
you'll have to keep an eye on him."
The teacher says OK, she can handle it. ...
1 Comments, 180 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
|
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Political Blunders from past years 6/3/2021
HILARIOUS AL GORE QUOTES AND BLUNDERS
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat."
-- Vice President Al Gore
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people
going to the polls."
-- Vice President Al Gore
...
1 Comments, 30 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
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Not coming back 1/29/2021
She told me that we couldn;t afford beer anymore and I'd
have to quit. Then I caught her spending $65. on her makeup.
And I asked her how I had to give up stuff and she didn't.
She said she needed the make up to look pretty for me. I told
her that was what the beer was for. I don't think she
is coming back.
1 Comments, 54 Views,
4 Votes
,4.02 Score
|
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Sally 1/5/2021
Little Sally arrived home from school one afternoon and
told her mother that Frankie Robinson had been showing
his penis while on the playground that morning. Before
the mother could respond, Sally said, it reminded me of
a peanut. Now with a little smirk on her face mother said
you mean that it was tiny? No, remarked Sally. It was salty
.
1 Comments, 86 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score
|
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how many times do you tickle an octopus 12/21/2020
10 tickles
1 Comments, 38 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
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Funny one 🤔😂 11/3/2020
There was a person. They were two. A short, an average and
a tall. The first say to the fourth. What do you want or an
apple? The next day it was raining...lol 🤷♂️
<br><br>
[image]...
1 Comments, 66 Views,
3 Votes
,0.49 Score
|
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Turn about is fair play 9/22/2020
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the
aisles. The sales notices him and asks him if she can
help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons
for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few
minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and
a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, 'Sir,
I thought...you were looking 4 tampons 4 ur ...
1 Comments, 128 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
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Catholic school girls 9/22/2020
A train hits a bus filled with Catholic girls and
they all perish. They r n heaven trying 2 enter the pearly
gates when St. Peter asks the first girl, ' Tami, have
you ever had any contact with a naughty organ? '
She giggles and shyly replies, Well i once touched the head
of one with the tip of my finger. ' He says okay dip the
tip of your finger in the holy water and pass through ...
1 Comments, 107 Views,
6 Votes
,4.50 Score
|
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O.J. Simpson 8/26/2020
I heard OJ is going to take another stab at marriage!
1 Comments, 14 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
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celebration 6/20/2020
I walked into a bar and told the bartender "give ne
5 shots of whiskey". He lined them up, poured them,
and i drank them. He asked me "Celebrating?"
I replied "kind of. First blow job." He smiled
"Congratulations. Let me buy you a beer." I
told him "If 5 shots of whiskey couldnt get the taste
out of my mouth, i dont think a beer is going to ...
1 Comments, 31 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
|
|
What did the fist say to the face 6/2/2020
Pow right on the kisser
1 Comments, 3 Views,
0 Votes
|
|
What's the difference between a rock and a dead ? 5/1/2020
You can't fuck a rock, !
1 Comments, 31 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
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Physics 4/7/2020
A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a beer the
bartender says for you....no charge.
1 Comments, 21 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
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Penis size 2/9/2020
You know someone once asked how big I was. I replied well
I'm only 2"s............ Off the floor
1 Comments, 43 Views,
5 Votes
,1.51 Score
|
|
Tooth Brush 2/1/2020
How do we know the tooth brush was invented by a Hillbilly
? <br><br>
. Because if anyone else had invented it ....it would be a
teeth brush
1 Comments, 18 Views,
11 Votes
,1.30 Score
|
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The difference between a wife & a girlfriend 2/1/2020
Q: What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend
? <br><br>
A: About 40 lbs <br><br>
Second A:Girlfriend takes part of your ....If you
divorce , wife takes it all
1 Comments, 53 Views,
10 Votes
,1.00 Score
|
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No need to swear! 1/27/2020
What do we want? A cure for Tourette's, When do we want it? 'C**T'!!
1 Comments, 22 Views,
11 Votes
,3.35 Score
|
|
Joking 1/23/2020
Jokes for points
1 Comments, 9 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score
|
|
these days ;) 1/21/2020
1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ."
1: "As if." 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." 1: "I don't have a sister." 2: "You will in about nine months."
1 Comments, 26 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
This site 1/19/2020
That’s the joke <br><br>
Posting for
1 Comments, 14 Views,
9 Votes
,2.78 Score
|
|
jimmy and his cat 1/17/2020
At School, the teacher asked Jimmy, “Why is your cat at
school today Jimmy?” Jimmy replied crying, “Because
I heard my daddy tell my mommy, ‘I am going to eat that p*ssy
once Jimmy leaves for school today!’”
1 Comments, 36 Views,
13 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
|
Points 1/16/2020
Yup, just one of those I need points posts
1 Comments, 12 Views,
8 Votes
,4.41 Score
|
|
cave man pussy 1/15/2020
why did cave men drag their women around by their hair? <br><br>
they learned the hard what that if they dragged them by their
feet that the pussy would fill up with dirt
1 Comments, 34 Views,
13 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
joke toke 1/13/2020
two rabies walk into a bar
1 Comments, 44 Views,
8 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
Knock Knock... Who's there? 1/9/2020
Points!... Points who! Do you have any because I sure dont!
1 Comments, 6 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
Why did the chicken cross the road? 1/9/2020
Because he wasn't cooked!  Ok I just needed ...
1 Comments, 5 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
|
|
Motivation to lose weight and get fit 1/8/2020
An overweight guy signed up a special training program
that guarantees he will lose all of his weight and be fit
within a day As he walked in a 3 floor building the trainer told him, in order to complete your training you have to go through
3 stages of training Each floor has its own stage <br><br>
The trainer takes the man to the first floor and he finds
a room full of naked ...
1 Comments, 70 Views,
11 Votes
,2.61 Score
|
|
Ass Joke 1/8/2020
If someone puts a cock up your ass and you don't feel
it, did it happen.
1 Comments, 14 Views,
8 Votes
,2.32 Score
|
|
classic oldie 1/7/2020
Aunt Molly went to her local grocer to buy her favorite summer
sausage to serve at the holidays. She served it as usual
but her guests complained that it just wasn't very
good. The next week back at the shop she asked the butcher
what's with the sausage , it just wasn't as good
as it had always been. He told her " at this time it was
hard to make both ends meat !
1 Comments, 37 Views,
10 Votes
,2.59 Score
|
|
Mono or stereo? 1/6/2020
For earsex? You like both ears? Or just they should change
hetero and homo to monosexual and stereosexual, but audiosex
it would pertain better, thanks!
1 Comments, 11 Views,
7 Votes
,0.75 Score
|
|
Wish I had unlimited points.. 1/6/2020
Thats notta joke..
1 Comments, 7 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
Two gay guys 1/5/2020
TWo gay guys walking past a funeral home. One guy asks the
the other guy .....want to go in for a cold one?
1 Comments, 14 Views,
6 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
4 the points 1/5/2020
Need the points
1 Comments, 10 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
what do you call a zebra with no legs 1/4/2020
a Savannah sandwich.
1 Comments, 11 Views,
8 Votes
,0.93 Score
|
|
Doctor visit 1/4/2020
Doctor walks into the office and tells his man patient,
I have some bad news, you are going to have to stop masturbating.
The patient said, I don't understand, Why? Doctor: Because I am trying to examine you.
1 Comments, 15 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
|
|
Doctor visit 1/4/2020
Doctor walks into the office and tells his man patient,
I have some bad news, you are going to have to stop masturbating.
The patient said, I don't understand, Why? Doctor: Because I am trying to examine you.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
6 Votes
,0.23 Score
|
|
Timbuktu 1/1/2020
The National Poetry Contest had come down semifinalists:
a Yale graduate and a redneck from Wyoming. They were given
a word, then allowed minutes study the word and come
up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were
given was Timbuktu. First recite his poem was the Yale
graduate. He stepped the microphone and said: <br><br>
Slowly across the desert sand Trekked a ...
1 Comments, 47 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
|
|
Sex Computer 1/1/2020
What’s the difference between a woman and a computer?
Computers don’t laugh at 3.5″ floppies
1 Comments, 8 Views,
6 Votes
,1.66 Score
|
|
Why don't vegan girls moan during sex? 12/31/2019
Because they don't want to admit that a piece of meat
gave them such pleasure.
1 Comments, 8 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
|
|
Jokes get chicks 12/27/2019
All girls love a funny guy so starting joking and get screwing
1 Comments, 10 Views,
8 Votes
,3.71 Score
|
|
snail buys a car 12/22/2019
So a snail is at a car dealership looking to by a car and the
dealer shows him several models before the snail sees nice
used BMW he likes. Of course the snail barter over price
and the snail finally saids, "Ok I will buy the car,
but on one condition, you need to paint and 'S'
on the doors." Dealer asks, "why do you want
me to paint an "S" on the door?' Snail ...
1 Comments, 35 Views,
12 Votes
,4.04 Score
|
|
This site, does it count as a joke? 12/21/2019
they keep increasing points left and right making it nearly
impossible . other options is and they
and $240/year ! lol GTFO !!
1 Comments, 19 Views,
13 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
For the points 12/20/2019
Just here for the points, vote so you can get some too lol
1 Comments, 7 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
Knock Knock ... Whos There? 12/15/2019
Points.. Points who.. I need points!
1 Comments, 9 Views,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
Points 12/10/2019
I could use a few.
1 Comments, 9 Views,
7 Votes
,1.00 Score
|
|
Paid member 12/5/2019
magazine article member
1 Comments, 13 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
|
|
Fav kind of blowjobs 12/1/2019
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold onto
your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.
1 Comments, 8 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
|
|
when an otter needs personal space 11/27/2019
get otter here.
1 Comments, 9 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
|
|
fish oppinion 11/27/2019
let minnow what you think
1 Comments, 3 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
|
|
car animal 11/27/2019
what do you call an animal you keep in your car? a carpet.
1 Comments, 7 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
|
Little Johnny Returns 11/25/2019
The teacher asked the class to use the ‘fascinate’
in a sentence. <br><br>
Molly put up her hand and said “My family went to granddad’s
farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”
<br><br>
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use
the word ‘fascinate’, not “fascinating” <br><br>
Sally raised her hand. She said, ...
1 Comments, 46 Views,
11 Votes
,3.92 Score
|
|
pickup lines 11/22/2019
girl if i was in of the alphabet I'd put u and I
together <br><br>
hey girl how about you open your chamber of secerts and let
me slyther in? <br><br>
sorry i didn't mean to come between you two or did i?
1 Comments, 6 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
|
|
this is a joke 11/21/2019
a man walks upto another and says i want your ciggy, he hands
him his ciggy and walks away.
1 Comments, 27 Views,
12 Votes
,0.15 Score
|
|
Points 11/17/2019
Just here for points.....
1 Comments, 7 Views,
4 Votes
,1.69 Score
|
|
Knock knock 11/12/2019
Knock Knock 's there? Orange Orange ? Orange
you going let Me in so I can Eat you ?!l
1 Comments, 11 Views,
7 Votes
,1.77 Score
|
|
A Joke 11/12/2019
My mate broke his leg so I went see him at home. “How are
you mate?” “Yeah I’m okay. But do me a favour mate.
Go fetch my slippers from upstairs. My feet are freezing.”
I went upstairs and found his gorgeous 19 year old daughters
lying naked on the bed. I said “Your dad’s sent up
here have sex with both of you. They respond “Get away
with ya... Prove it.” I shouted ...
1 Comments, 53 Views,
9 Votes
,3.00 Score
|
|
Sexual Relief 11/11/2019
A new Army Captain was assigned to an outfit in a remote post
in the Afghanistan Desert. <br><br>
During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a
camel behind the mess tent. He asks the sergeant why the
camel is kept there. The nervous sergeant said, "Well
sir, as you know, there are 50 men here on the post & no
women. And sir, sometimes the men have 'urges'. ...
1 Comments, 62 Views,
13 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
I have a joke 11/9/2019
Wanna hear a dirty joke?
1 Comments, 16 Views,
6 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
Penis 11/5/2019
What do you call the useless piece of skin on a dick? <br><br>
The man.
1 Comments, 24 Views,
17 Votes
,1.43 Score
|
|
Joke 11/3/2019
Hello BookofSex.com, ever had that one person you just wanted walk
up and say hey I would love fuck You? Yea ...
1 Comments, 18 Views,
5 Votes
,0.86 Score
|
|
Lesbian 11/2/2019
What do they call a lesbian dinosaur? <br><br>
Lick-a-lot-o-puss
1 Comments, 7 Views,
6 Votes
,1.09 Score
|
|
Hair 11/1/2019
A realized that she had grown hair between her legs.
She got worried and asked her mom about that hair. <br><br>
Her mom calmly said, “That part where the hair has grown
is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair.”
…. the smiled. <br><br>
At dinner, she told her sister, “ monkey has grown hair.”
Her sister smiled and said, “That’s nothing, ...
1 Comments, 34 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
Priest 10/27/2019
What’s the difference between a catholic priest and
a zit? <br><br>
A zit will wait you’re before it comes on
your .
1 Comments, 17 Views,
9 Votes
,1.07 Score
|
|
Dinosaur 10/27/2019
What do you a lesbian dinosaur? <br><br>
Lick-a-lot-o-puss
1 Comments, 10 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
|
Doctor's wife 10/27/2019
A doctor and his wife were having a big argument over breakfast
one morning. <br><br>
As things got heated, the doctor shouted at his wife, “You
aren’t so good in bed either!” and then he stormed out
of the room and went to wor <br><br>
A couple of hours later he was feeling guilty about what
he’d said so he decided call his wife apologize.
<br><br> ...
1 Comments, 52 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
|
|
Threesome 10/27/2019
My girlfriend asked me if I could have a threesome, which
of her friends I would choose. Apparently, I was only supposed to name one, not two.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
|
like to meet 10/27/2019
i like to meet and around and missed around to get to
know her funny side first to get her feel like open
1 Comments, 6 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
|
|
more humour 10/25/2019
An old man is walking in Amsterdam and passes a standing
at her door. She asks him: "Granddad, why don't we give it
a try?” "No girl, that is no longer possible for me” he replies.
Says the : "Come on, what have we got to lose,
we can give it a try!?” They both go inside. They undress and then he acts like a young man and performs
5 times in a row. "Oh my ...
1 Comments, 40 Views,
6 Votes
,4.22 Score
|
|
G-spot 10/24/2019
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball...
<br><br>
A man will for a golf ball.
1 Comments, 8 Views,
3 Votes
,0.98 Score
|
|
What happens when you make it 11 points per chat? 10/24/2019
We slowly loose our patience until we can't be bothered
anymore.
1 Comments, 6 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
sorry need more points 10/21/2019
points points points points points points points points.
1 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,1.69 Score
|
|
whores 10/19/2019
some woman here are really whores they ask for all this from
you and want to be the biggest in here its just pussy
thats all to men
1 Comments, 14 Views,
7 Votes
,0.24 Score
|
|
points 10/14/2019
points points points points points points points.
1 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
the points 10/14/2019
points points points points points points points.
1 Comments, 7 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
|
points 10/13/2019
points points points points points points points points.
1 Comments, 5 Views,
3 Votes
,2.94 Score
|
|
bad jokes 10/9/2019
What is Jafar when he is next to you? Ja-near What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh What did the eye say to the other eye? Something between
us smells
1 Comments, 9 Views,
8 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
terrible joke . . . 10/8/2019
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity... It's impossible to put down!
1 Comments, 10 Views,
8 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
a joke 10/8/2019
A woman was enjoying a good game of golf with her girlfriends.
"Oh, no!" she suddenly exclaimed. "Look
at the time! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband!
He'll be so pissed if it's not ready on time."
When she got home, she discovered all she had in the fridge
was a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg - and a can of cat food. With no time to go to the ...
1 Comments, 47 Views,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
|
Dad joke alert... 10/7/2019
Today, my asked "Can I have a mark?"
and I burst into tears. years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
1 Comments, 6 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
|
|
2 guys and their dogs 10/6/2019
2 guys are out walking their dogs thru the city. They get
and the first guy suggests they stop at a restaurant
to get a bite to eat. The second guy says, "We have our
dogs, they won't let us in". First guy says "no
problem, just follow my lead". They walk up to the
restaurant and ask for a table. Hostess says "Sorry,
we don't allow dogs". First guy ...
1 Comments, 41 Views,
7 Votes
,1.51 Score
|
|
Politics 10/5/2019
A boy asks his father: - Dad, I have to give a presentation at school, can I ask you
some questions? - Yes of course, come on, what do you want to know? - What are politics? The father reflects for a moment and then starts: - Well then, let’s take our home as an example. I am an employee,
so I earn money, so let's call me "capitalism".
Your mother is the administrator of the ...
1 Comments, 28 Views,
5 Votes
,2.16 Score
|
|
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? 10/4/2019
Beat it. We're closed.
1 Comments, 7 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
|
|
Toilet humour 10/4/2019
Three ladies of a certain age are discussing problems associated
with ageing. “60 is far the worst age”, says the first.
“You feel like you’re always needing to , but in fact
there’s nothing there”. <br><br>
“That’s nothing”, says the second, “when you’re
70, your digestive system packs up. You take plenty of laxatives,
eat loads of fibre, and spend all day ...
1 Comments, 32 Views,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
More Humour 10/1/2019
Mrs. Donovan was walking down O’Connell Street in Dublin
when she met up with Father Flaherty. The Father said, ‘Top o’ the mornin’ To ye! Aren’t
ye Mrs. Donovan And didn’t I marry ye and yer Hoosband
two years ago?’ She replied, ‘Aye, that ye did, Father.’ The Father asked, ‘And be there Any wee little ones yet?’
She replied, ‘No, not yet, Father.’ The Father said, ...
1 Comments, 34 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
|
limrick 9/30/2019
there was a man from bombay who made a cunt out of clay he put
in his prick it hardened like a brick and tore his forskin
away
1 Comments, 15 Views,
7 Votes
,0.49 Score
|
|
another funny 9/30/2019
what do dyslexic zombies eat? <br><br>
<br><br>
BRAINS <br><br>
<br><br>
ha!!!
1 Comments, 10 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
monday funny 9/30/2019
my wife keeps using the word 'mansplaining' wrong
and I don't know how to tell her! <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
ha!
1 Comments, 7 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
|
|
More Humour 9/29/2019
A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday.
She spends $, 000 and looks sensational. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to a newspaper.
Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t
mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”. ‘About 32, ’ is the reply.’ ‘Nope! I’m exactly 50, ’ the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into ...
1 Comments, 40 Views,
12 Votes
,4.21 Score
|
|
are you smuggling opiates... 9/29/2019
Him= Are you smuggling opiates in your bra? Her= No, why? Him- Because I see a "Perky Set" in there!
1 Comments, 8 Views,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
|
More Humour 9/28/2019
After two weeks on a desert island with only each other for
company, Bob and Geoff are getting horny. "Look, " says Bob, "Neither of us are
gay, but if you pretend to be a women for me, when I'm
done, I'll pretend to be a woman for you." Geoff reluctantly agrees and suffers minutes of painful
humiliation as Bob fucks him up the arse. When it's
over, Geoff asks Bob ...
1 Comments, 38 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
Strange Day 9/27/2019
I've had a weird day today First I found a hat full of coins Then I got chased down the road by a bloke with a guitar.....
1 Comments, 22 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
Damsel in Distress 9/25/2019
A man brags about finding a woman strapped to some railroad
tracks and untying her, taking her home and having the best
sex of his life with her. His friend asked, was she cute?
He replies I don’t know I couldn’t find her head.
1 Comments, 8 Views,
6 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
Clownin 9/21/2019
Knock knock......who is it... knock harder.... who is
it... sorry didnt know I was knocking... my dick was on hard
1 Comments, 26 Views,
14 Votes
,1.06 Score
|
|
More Humour 9/16/2019
A fledgling journalist has been sent out to an interview
an elderly lady for the local rag, she has just turned 104
and still lives at home. The journo scribbles down the old
lady's life story in shorthand; schooldays, war ,
loves, marriage, widowhood. Then he arrived at the crucial
question. Journo: "Well then Edna, the $64, 000 dollar question!
All our readers will want to know the ...
1 Comments, 31 Views,
2 Votes
,5.20 Score
|
|
More Humour 9/16/2019
The wife was bent over looking at something and it was to
good an opportunity to miss. I pulled her knickers to one side and did what nature intended.
Apparently we are banned from Walmart now .
1 Comments, 19 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
|
Mom 3some 9/13/2019
A guy is in a bar talking to a beautiful 60yr old woman things
get heated up and she whispers in his ear "have you
ever had a mom and 3some" the guy is thinking
if she looks this good at 60 her must be amazing.
So he goes home with her and as they head upstairs the woman
yells " mom take off your depends and clean yourself
up I brought us home a live one"
1 Comments, 26 Views,
11 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
When its an appropriate time to Joke about... 9/8/2019
When have you been able to joke about things with your partner.
Some of the short-cummins or long cummings etc. with your
partner? Have you been able to hold your tongue until there
was open air where you could share and accept your partners
critiques? Have you been with other couples where you enjoyed
things but maybe said something a bit too much? Then had
to walk it back.
1 Comments, 19 Views,
8 Votes
,0.70 Score
|
|
Doctor Viisit 9/7/2019
A guy is sitting at the doctor’s office. The doctor walks
in and says, “I have some bad news. I’m afraid you’re
going to have to stop masturbating.” <br><br>
“I don’t understand, doc, ” the patient says. “Why?”
<br><br>
“Because, ” the doctor says. “I’m trying to examine
you.”
1 Comments, 8 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
A boy 9/6/2019
A little boy and his friends are being called bastards and
bitches by bullies at school. The boy goes home and asks,
"Dad, what are bastards and bitches?" And his
dad replies, "Bitches are ladies and bastards are
gentlemen." Then the boy goes upstairs to see his
mom. As he enters the room, he accidentally drops a perfume
bottle, and his mom says, "Shit!" "Mom, ...
1 Comments, 34 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
|
More Humour 9/4/2019
Last night my wife wore a police uniform in bed and said,
"you've been arrested for being good in bed!"
<br><br>
90 seconds later the charges were dropped due to lack of
evidence...
1 Comments, 7 Views,
4 Votes
,4.02 Score
|
|
Pharmacist joke 8/31/2019
"Being a pharmacist is great because you're
kind of a doctor, but also a cashier." -Dave Attell
1 Comments, 8 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
|
|
points 8/28/2019
points points points points points points points
1 Comments, 8 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
Wanna hear a joke. 8/27/2019
My sad sad need for points
1 Comments, 8 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
More Humour 8/27/2019
A is in the kitchen making dinner for her family
when her walks in. “, where do babies
come from?” The thinks for a few seconds and says,
“Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married.
One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug,
and have sex.” The looks puzzled so the
continues, “ means the daddy puts his penis in the
mommy’s vagina. ’s how you get a ...
1 Comments, 23 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
more humour 8/24/2019
In a recent survey 100 women were asked what shower soap
they preferred . 99 percent of the women replied "Get out of the shower
you pervert"
1 Comments, 14 Views,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
More Humour 8/24/2019
I came home from the pub last night and the wife said to
me "What time do you call this"? 56 years of age and still cant tell the time ....
1 Comments, 19 Views,
8 Votes
,2.78 Score
|
|
More Humour 8/17/2019
An 80-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his tests come back with normal results. The doctor says, 'George, everything looks great.
How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?' George replies, 'God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when
I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, poof!
The light goes ...
1 Comments, 39 Views,
11 Votes
,2.61 Score
|
|
Tuesday fun 8/13/2019
I imagine the day you OD on viagra is the hardest day of your
life!!!! ha!
1 Comments, 17 Views,
11 Votes
,2.23 Score
|
|
Chicken Licken 8/9/2019
Why did the chicken cross the playground...... ...... ...... ...... ...... ...... ...... To get to the other slide.
1 Comments, 10 Views,
5 Votes
,3.47 Score
|
|
Impossible to Put a Worm into Its Hole 8/8/2019
After a good summer rain, young Johnny was playing in his
grandparent's yard and noticed the worms had come
out. He was trying to push the worm back into its wormhole.
His grandfather saw this effort and told him that putting
the worm back into the hle is impossible. <br><br>
Johnny bet his grandfather that he could do it for ten dollars.
His grandfather laughed and took the ...
1 Comments, 50 Views,
9 Votes
,1.50 Score
|
|
The biggest joke 8/8/2019
The biggest joke is how so many people bitch and complain
about points, the IM, and this website. Most are non
members......but they stay here rather than move on. Maybe
they just love to complain about everything?
1 Comments, 10 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
|
|
What black women like? 8/7/2019
Do bigger black women enjoy the tall, white, and skinny
boys or do they just chase after anything that will give
them the sex which they seek?
1 Comments, 12 Views,
4 Votes
,1.69 Score
|
|
Cheesy joke 8/7/2019
Did you hear about the explosion in the French cheese factory?.....
<br><br>
There was DeBrie everywhere!
1 Comments, 5 Views,
3 Votes
,2.94 Score
|
|
Dad Jokes Pt. 2 8/6/2019
If a refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty
of resisting a rest?
1 Comments, 10 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
IM 8/5/2019
BookofSex.com IM is a bit of a joke most of the time.....
1 Comments, 10 Views,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
|
|
Dick Picks 8/5/2019
Funny, but true... <br><br>
[image]...
1 Comments, 6 Views,
3 Votes
,2.94 Score
|
|
Red Dildo? 8/5/2019
Too funny... <br><br>
[image]...
1 Comments, 11 Views,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
Sign seen last December 8/5/2019
Saw this road-side sign last December... <br><br>
[image]...
1 Comments, 14 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score
|
|
Why do women like big cock. 8/2/2019
So they can ride it all night LOL!
1 Comments, 12 Views,
7 Votes
,1.77 Score
|
|
sometimes a joke is just a joke 7/30/2019
i ran across this joke on here which to me was very genius!
<br><br>
the joke is a member posted an article, and i paraphrase;
there is no article, i just needed the points. <br><br>
thanks for understanding! <br><br>
also, sometimes a joke is just a joke if first clarified.
i once joked on a bet where the wager was sex. i don't
thing she found the humor ...
1 Comments, 11 Views,
7 Votes
,1.77 Score
|
|
Advice 7/29/2019
If it feels like more than 2 fingers. Its probably a dick.
You are welcome
1 Comments, 12 Views,
7 Votes
,3.04 Score
|
|
snowmen 7/29/2019
Why wouldnt the snowwoman go with the snowman? Because he didnt have any snowballs...har har har, im off
drive a car...ooh this should be in the poetry section
as well! points points points
1 Comments, 12 Views,
9 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
Joke 7/24/2019
Why did yrmthe
1 Comments, 15 Views,
11 Votes
,1.48 Score
|
|
Man from Kent 7/20/2019
There was a young man from Kent, <br><br>
's tool was decidedly bent, <br><br>
To save himself trouble, <br><br>
He put it in double, <br><br>
Instead of coming he went!!...
1 Comments, 15 Views,
9 Votes
,1.93 Score
|
|
A Funny 7/20/2019
Hope you enjoy this one. I think
it's good...
1 Comments, 23 Views,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
|
Dad Jokes Anyone? 7/19/2019
Today, my asked "Can I have a book mark?"
and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't
know my name is Brian.
1 Comments, 15 Views,
9 Votes
,3.85 Score
|
|
A coincidence 7/10/2019
A chicken farmer went the local bar. He sat next a woman
and ordered champagne. <br><br>
The woman said: "How strange, I also just ordered a glass of champagne".
<br><br>
"What a coincidence ", said the farmer, who
added, "It is a special for . I am celebrating...."
<br><br>
"It is a special for , too, I am ...
1 Comments, 47 Views,
11 Votes
,3.73 Score
|
|
Sunday Morning Sex 7/6/2019
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed
away, Katie went straight her grandparent’s house
visit her 95-year-old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother
replied, “He had a heart attack while we were making love
on Sunday morning.” <br><br>
Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that two people
nearly 100 years ...
1 Comments, 57 Views,
13 Votes
,4.15 Score
|
|
points 7/2/2019
need more points all of the points.
1 Comments, 10 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
|
poin ts 6/27/2019
points points points points points points
1 Comments, 4 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
Points 6/22/2019
Just here for the points.
1 Comments, 5 Views,
4 Votes
,1.69 Score
|
|
funny! 6/19/2019
if a blind person says you have a big penis they're probably
pulling your leg!!!
1 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
come chat with me 6/19/2019
I ggot all kinds of joke.. people love when im around. im
the laugh of the party
1 Comments, 7 Views,
3 Votes
|
|
Friday 6/16/2019
Dam smokey its Friday and you aint got no job
1 Comments, 12 Views,
6 Votes
,0.52 Score
|
|
sat fun 6/15/2019
my over weight parrot died today, it is sad but a huge weight
off of my shoulder.
1 Comments, 4 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
|
|
This IM System 6/7/2019
That is it.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
7 Votes
,1.51 Score
|
|
Johnny and the Principal 6/3/2019
Johnny got sent to the principal's office by his teacher.
<br><br>
<br><br>
"Johnny, " the principal asked, "what
did you do this time?" <br><br>
"All I did was tell Bobby that Mrs Johnson has a great
ass, " Johnny replied. <br><br>
The principal frowned. "Johnny, you can't say
things like that about a ...
1 Comments, 60 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
|
|
This Damn Sites IM 5/26/2019
can never messsage someone straight up
1 Comments, 14 Views,
11 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
;) 5/25/2019
A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and
holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank
vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I
don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm
samples. <br><br>
The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples ...
1 Comments, 59 Views,
15 Votes
,2.06 Score
|
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Monday pic me up 5/20/2019
I met a guy with 5 dicks and I asked him how his pants fit, he
said like a glove!! <br><br>
<br><br>
best I got
1 Comments, 8 Views,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
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joke 5/17/2019
whats white and red and black all over...whatever you want
it to be
1 Comments, 25 Views,
15 Votes
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joke 5/16/2019
this damn sites messenger
1 Comments, 9 Views,
7 Votes
,1.51 Score
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More Puns 5/11/2019
1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons.
The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry,
sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.' <br><br>
2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other
and says 'Dam!' <br><br>
3. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit
a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it ...
1 Comments, 51 Views,
21 Votes
,2.51 Score
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The IRS joke! 5/8/2019
Mr Johnson got a notice from the IRS he might be audited,
and he should show the local IRS office next Monday morning 10. So, he called his attorney, and the two of them showed the IRS office 10, right on time. <br><br>
"Mr Johnson, " the IRS agent said, we have some
questions about some of your financial activities. into my office so we can discuss them." ...
1 Comments, 63 Views,
12 Votes
,3.15 Score
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A Blonde Husband 5/3/2019
women were having lunch together, and discussing the
merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman says, "I
need to be honest with you, getting a boob job."
<br><br>
The second woman says "Oh that's nothing,
thinking of having my asshole bleached!" <br><br>
To which the first replies, "Whoa, I just can't
picture your husband as a ...
1 Comments, 47 Views,
11 Votes
,2.61 Score
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Testicles 5/2/2019
An American woman is in the produce department the local
supermarket searching for the best looking russet potatoes
she can find to bake in the oven for supper night. She
comes across a potato so large, she has to use both hands
to pick it . Just then a Middle Eastern woman sees it and
says; "Oh my, potato reminds of my husband's
testicles!" "Are his testicles this ...
1 Comments, 18 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
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Mosquito 5/2/2019
What's the difference between a and a mosquito?
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
A mosquito stops sucking after you smack it!
1 Comments, 4 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
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Corny 4/27/2019
What did Sushi "A" say to Sushi "B"?
<br><br>
Wasabi!
1 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,1.51 Score
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Sight? 4/24/2019
"I see", said the blind carpenter, as he picked
his hammer and saw.
1 Comments, 21 Views,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
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another 4/20/2019
what do you call a constipated detective? <br><br>
no shit sherlock!
1 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
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The joke of the day 4/1/2019
A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't
paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three
ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are
left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher
asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the
shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No,
two, but I like how you're thinking." ...
1 Comments, 49 Views,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
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Moral of the story 6/29/2021
On the farm lived a chicken and a , both of whom loved
to play together. One day, the two were playing when the
fell into a bog and began to sink. Scared for his life,
the whinnied for the chicken to go get the farmer for
help!Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at
the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but to
no avail, for he had gone to town with the only ...
0 Comments, 33 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
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Family Fun 6/29/2021
A husband, one bright sunny morning, turns to his lovely
wife, "Honey, we're going fishing this weekend,
you, me and the dog."
The wife grimaces, "But I don't like fishing!"
"Look! We're going fishing and that's final."
"Do I have to go fishing with you... I really don't
want to go!" "Right I'll give you three choices... 1 You come
fishing with me and the dog... 2 You give me a BLOW ...
0 Comments, 194 Views,
4 Votes
,1.30 Score
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LIL' JOHNNY 6/29/2021
A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed
4-year-old Little Johnny standing wide-eyed at the fence,
soaking in the whole event.
The man thought, "Great... he's 4 and I'm
gonna have to start explaining the birds and the bees. No
need to jump the gun - I'll just let him ask, and I'll
answer."
After everything was over, the man walked over to his
and said, ...
0 Comments, 71 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
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Take Your Choice 6/26/2021
A husband, one bright sunny morning, turns to his lovely
wife, "Wife, we're going fishing this weekend,
you, me and the dog." The wife grimaces, "But I don't like fishing!"
"Look! We're going fishing and that's final."
"Do I have to go fishing with you... I really don't
want to go!" "Right I'll give you three choices... 1 You come
fishing with me and the dog... 2 You give me a BLOW JOB....
3 or ...
0 Comments, 118 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
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Deer Roping 6/26/2021
Deer Roping > I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it
in a stall,
> feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it
and eat it. The
> first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured
that since
> they congregated at my cattle feeder and do not seem
to have much fear
> of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come
right up and ...
0 Comments, 77 Views,
2 Votes
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CATHOLIC HORSES???? 6/24/2021
One day while he was at the track playing the ponies and
all but losing his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped
out onto the track and blessed the forehead of one of the
horses lining up for the 4th race.
Lo and behold, that - a very long shot - won the race.
Before the next race, as the horses began lining up, Mitch
watched with interest the old priest step onto the ...
0 Comments, 58 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score
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little boy caught pulling 6/19/2021
One day a little boy was in the bathroom beating off when
his dad walked into the bathroom and caught him. The dad
told his ", I told you if you keep doing that
you are going to go blind".
the little boy replied, "DAD I am over here"!
0 Comments, 53 Views,
16 Votes
,4.89 Score
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Group therapy 6/3/2021
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session
with four young mothers and their small .
"You all have obsessions, " he observed.
To the first mother, Mary, he said, "You are obsessed
with eating. You've even named your Candy."
He turned to the second mom, Ann, and said, "Your obsession
is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your 's
name, Penny." ...
0 Comments, 97 Views,
6 Votes
,3.93 Score
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What do you call a 8/7/2020
What do you call a Lesbian dinosaur? A Lickasaurous
0 Comments, 8 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
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Pub 4/21/2020
An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman all walk into a pub
<br><br>
Those were the days.......
0 Comments, 96 Views,
5 Votes
,4.77 Score
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First video 1/7/2020
I watched my first porno the other night....damn I was young
back thrn!
0 Comments, 13 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
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What happens when you make it 11 points per chat? 10/24/2019
We slowly loose our patience until we can't be bothered
anymore.
0 Comments, 2 Views,
0 Votes
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A cheesy joke, literally 10/21/2019
Q. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in
France? <br><br>
A. There was nothing left but de Brie.
0 Comments, 3 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
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More points 10/19/2019
Q-Have you heard the one about the guy needs more points?
A-It was pointless
0 Comments, 7 Views,
6 Votes
,1.66 Score
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Must have more points 10/18/2019
Points points points and more importantly, more points
because currently pointless
0 Comments, 5 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
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More Humour 8/17/2019
A Scottish couple took in an 18-year-old as a lodger.
She asked if she could have a bath, but the woman of the house
told her they didn't have a bath, although if she wanted
to, she could use a tin bath in front of the fire. "Monday's the best night, when my husband goes
to darts, " she said. The agreed to have a bath the following Monday. After her husband had gone to the ...
0 Comments, 45 Views,
13 Votes
,2.64 Score
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I have a Great Joke for you all 7/29/2019
Ever try to Im a memeber here and hope for a responce .I try
alot of messages and no one replys . Maybe i might get one
reply so means the messanger is broke
0 Comments, 3 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
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Sex Life After Marriage 5/3/2019
It’s true when they say your sex life changes after you
get married, because now you are sleeping with a relative!!!
0 Comments, 26 Views,
13 Votes
,1.80 Score
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little Sally 5/1/2019
Little sally came home from school and told her mother
Frankie Robinson was showing his penis while on the playground.
Mother tried to respond but before she could little Sally
said, it reminded of a peanut. Mother said, you mean it was tiny? No said little Sally, it was salty
0 Comments, 39 Views,
12 Votes
,2.62 Score
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