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Towel Drop   1/19/2005

A beautiful young woman gets out of the shower, wraps a towel around her form and tells her husband that he can get in the shower. As he enters the shower, the doorbell rings. <br> The wife says she'll get the door and goes downstairs. <br> When she opens the door, she sees her neighbor, Bill, whose mouth opens wide at the sight of her shimmering form. <br> He ...


0 Comments, 250 Views, 13 Votes ,5.32 Score
This could be great for some, Really bad for others   1/19/2005

A company is hosting a party for all its employees, and a man asks his wife to accompany him to the event. His wife graciously declines, bacuse she is not feelig well, but says, "you go on honey, and have good time". So the man procedes to the party by himself. While at the party he has a few drinks, and starts to get a little friendly with a secratary. Responding to his advances the ...


1 Comments, 93 Views, 2 Votes ,3.12 Score
10 bucks   1/17/2005

Kirk was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. Kirk took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead?" "No, I had to stop drinking years ago, " the homeless man replied. "Will you use it to gamble instead ...


0 Comments, 102 Views, 7 Votes ,4.06 Score
Lying Bastard   1/17/2005

A police officer pulls a motorist over for speeding. Whilst he is writing out the ticket he decides to check the car for roadworthiness. <br> The motorist doesn't object to this but as the policeman walks to the car he says "Hey, officer, I wouldn't look in the trunk if I were you". <br> "Why not", replies the policeman <br> "Well" says the motorist, "I've ...


0 Comments, 138 Views, 8 Votes ,4.41 Score
The Ducks   1/17/2005

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night in a hotel room and Donald wanted to have sex with Daisy. <br> The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have a condom?" Donald frowned and said "No" Daisy told Donald that they could not have sex if he didn't have a condom. <br> "Maybe they sell them at the front desk, " she suggested. <br> So Donald ...


0 Comments, 85 Views, 3 Votes ,3.43 Score
Fairies   1/16/2005

A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish." "Ooh, I want to travel around the world with my darling ...


1 Comments, 202 Views, 25 Votes ,4.13 Score
Cool things about being a man:   1/16/2005

1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview. 2. Your orgasms are real. Always. 3. Your last name stays put. 4. The garage is all yours. 5. Wedding plans take care of themselves. 6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid. 7. Car mechanics tell you the truth. 8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut. 9. Hot wax never comes near ...


1 Comments, 54 Views, 5 Votes ,5.75 Score
sexyboi2294 40 M
2  Articles
mother of six   1/14/2005

This married couple have their 6th after about 2 years the pround father tells his wife that he's gonna start callin her mother of 6. One night while at a get together the husband looks at his wife and says "ready to go mother of 6" and she replies by saying yes father of 4.


1 Comments, 135 Views, 6 Votes ,2.51 Score
Diet Plan   1/14/2005

A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. due to very serious health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. "Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself. <br> But desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program. The next day there's a knock ...


2 Comments, 207 Views, 22 Votes ,5.29 Score
OH NO you didn't just say that   1/13/2005

Scenerio:: You are in a club with friends dancing, laughing and having a good time. You feel a tap on your shoulder you turn around, and hear "baby if you were a mcdonalds hamburber you'd be the Mc gorgeous" A. should you laugh B. Cry C. Turn and run D all of the above <br> Weve all heard em maybe even used them some good some bad some just down right sad. Heres a few of ...


1 Comments, 108 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
Bottle Of Wine   1/13/2005

A man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant and while sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a nearby table all alone. <br> He calls the waiter over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot to be sent over to her knowing that, if she accepts it, she is his. <br> The waiter gets the bottle and quickly sends it over to the woman, ...


1 Comments, 180 Views, 12 Votes ,5.27 Score
How To Speak Nortakotan !!!!!   1/12/2005

How To Speak Nortakotan <br> I think my accent - what there is of it - comes from where I was brought up, not so much my ancestry, which is Norwegian, Czech, and German. People who live in North Dakota and Minnesota, especially those who hail from the Northern regions of these states, have a special way of talking. <br> I've decided that it's probably from ...


1 Comments, 151 Views, 11 Votes ,2.61 Score
Sexual Positions.   1/12/2005

A woman went to the doctor and complained that she was suffering from knee pains. <br> "Do you indulge in any activity that puts a lot of pressure on your knees?" asked the doctor. <br> "Every night, my husband and I have sex on the floor doggy style." <br> "I see, " said the doctor. <br> "You know, there are plenty of other sexual ...


1 Comments, 93 Views, 8 Votes ,2.55 Score
The Fisherman   1/12/2005

Saturday morning a fisherman gets up early, dresses quietly, gets his lunch made, puts on his long johns, grabs the dog and goes to the garage to hook up his boat to the truck and head down to his favorite fishing area. <br> Coming out of his garage rain is pouring down; it is like a torrential downpour. There is snow mixed in with the rain, and the wind is blowing 50 mph. ...


1 Comments, 79 Views, 5 Votes ,3.47 Score
Firm this up   1/12/2005

This guy decides he's going to play a little joke on his wife one day. As she steps out of the shower, he grabs one of her breasts and says, "If you firmed these up a bit, you wouldn't have to keep using your bra." He laughs and laughs. <br> The next morning, he again catches her as she finishes her shower and grabs her ass and says "If you firmed this up a bit, you wouldn't ...


1 Comments, 81 Views, 4 Votes ,2.47 Score
Birthday Sex   1/12/2005

Adam was talking to his friend at the bar, and he said, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday - she has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I'm stuck." His friend said, "I have an idea! Why don't you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled." Adam decided to take his ...


1 Comments, 97 Views, 7 Votes ,3.55 Score
Caribbean vacation   1/12/2005

An English lady goes on vacation to the Caribbean wishing her husband had been able to join her. Upon arriving, she meets a black man, and after a night of passionate love making she asks him, "What is your name?" <br> "I can't tell you" the black man says. Every night they meet and every night she asks him again what his name is and he always responds the same, he can not tell ...


1 Comments, 107 Views, 7 Votes ,2.28 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus?   1/11/2005

Here's a prime example offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: <br> <br> "Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As homework tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your ...


1 Comments, 78 Views, 5 Votes ,4.45 Score
Bra Sizes   1/11/2005

Ever wonder why they use ABCDEF to define bra sizes? <br> <br> A - Absent <br> <br> B - Barely visable <br> <br> C - Come in useful <br> <br> D - Damn good <br> <br> E - Enormus <br> <br> F - Fantastic <br> <br> FF - F@@king fake


1 Comments, 205 Views, 11 Votes ,4.48 Score
Dear John Letter   1/11/2005

A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows: <br> Dear Ricky, I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us. I'm sorry. Please return the picture of me ...


0 Comments, 219 Views, 15 Votes ,6.81 Score
Billy Bob   1/10/2005

One day Billy Bob goes to town wearing nothing but his gun belt and boots. <br> The sheriff spots him and asks, "What the hell are you doing walking around town dressed like that?" <br> B.B. replies, "Well sheriff, it's a long story. Me and Mary Lou was down on the farm and we started a-cuddlin'. Mary Lou said we should go in the barn and we did. Inside the barn we ...


0 Comments, 144 Views, 9 Votes ,2.36 Score
Lilbicurious68 47 F
1  Article
Female drivers   1/9/2005

A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady forty miles per hour. <br> The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks across at her and speaks in a clear voice. <br> "Darling, " he says. "I know we've been married for twenty years, but want a divorce." <br> The wife says nothing, keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases ...


2 Comments, 262 Views, 16 Votes ,3.86 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
The Sex Fairy   1/8/2005

Who couldn't use some love <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> The Sex Fairy <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> This is hilarious! Be sure to read the warning at the bottom. I didn't change a word! I'm not messing with the Sex Fairy! <br> <br> <br> 1. Sex is a beauty treatment. ...


1 Comments, 223 Views, 12 Votes ,3.86 Score
BJ anyone......   1/7/2005

Two prostitutes are standing on a corner, one says "Tonight is gonna be a good night, I can smell dick in the air". The other replies, "Sorry, I just burped"


0 Comments, 420 Views, 29 Votes ,3.84 Score
Fun things to do in an elevator   1/7/2005

In an elevator... <br> When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you. <br> Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more. <br> Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones. <br> Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches ...


0 Comments, 322 Views, 32 Votes ,5.87 Score
Don't ya hate it when....   1/7/2005

People point at their wrist while asking for the time. 'I know where my watch is buddy, where the fuck is yours?' Do you point at your crotch when you ask where the toilet is? <br> People say, "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too." Piss off. What good is a goddamn cake if you can't eat it? <br> People say, "It's always in the last place you'd look." ...


0 Comments, 265 Views, 34 Votes ,5.40 Score
Always remember....   1/7/2005

It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor’s newspaper that's the time to do it. <br> It's a small world. So you gotta use your elbows a lot. <br> Sex is like air. It's not important unless you aren't getting any. <br> No one is listening until you make a mistake. <br> Always remember you're unique, just like ...


1 Comments, 587 Views, 51 Votes ,4.81 Score
ramjeter5 54 C
70  Articles
What would you do with yours?   1/7/2005

During a recent survey, women were asked... > >"What would you do if you woke up and had a penis?" > >Here are their actual responses... > >"I would walk around and prod my husband all night >long with it, whatever he is doing I'll be there prodding >him with it." > >"I would write my name in the snow." > >"I would go into ...


1 Comments, 121 Views, 6 Votes ,4.50 Score
ramjeter5 54 C
70  Articles
The Hormone Hostage   1/7/2005

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his very life into his own hands! <br> <br> <br> This is a handy guide that should be as common as <br> a driver's license in the wallet of <br> every husband, boyfriend, or significant other. <br> DANGEROUS: ...


1 Comments, 87 Views, 10 Votes ,3.98 Score
precious0778 71 C
9  Articles
One More Beer   1/6/2005

A guy leaves the bar, hoping he can get home early enough so not to piss his wife off for drinking after work. He gets home and finds his boss in bed with his wife. He heads back to the bar and tells the bartender the story. <br> "Wow, that's awful, what did you do?" "Well, I carefully snuck back out the door and hi-tailed it back here, shoot, they we're just getting started so ...


0 Comments, 217 Views, 12 Votes ,3.68 Score
KasnAni 49 C
12  Articles
A couple of doozies   1/6/2005

Okay, I'm not putting these jokes here expecting a high score or anything. In fact, they're so bad that I expect a really low score. I just want one more legitimate article, so that I can get the max. # of pts. available for writing articles. So, here goes. <br> A giraffe walks into a bar and says, "Hey, everyone, the highballs are on me!" <br> A polar bear ...


0 Comments, 81 Views, 2 Votes ,1.04 Score
Shit List   1/5/2005

GHOST POOPIE: The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet. <br> CLEAN POOPIE: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper. <br> WET POOPIE: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your ...


0 Comments, 80 Views, 6 Votes ,4.50 Score
Little ol ladies need luv too!   1/5/2005

A little old lady with blue hair entered the marital aids shop and asked in a quivering voice, "Yy-young man, dd-do y-you sell-dildos h-here?" The salesman, somewhat taken aback by the little old lady's appearance in his shop, answered "Uh, yes, ma'am. We do." The little old lady, holding her quivering hands about 10 inches apart asked, "D- do y-you ha-aave any ab-bb-bout th-this ...


0 Comments, 135 Views, 11 Votes ,3.35 Score
Yo Mama jokes....I think they're funny   1/4/2005

Yo mama is so ugly, she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning. <br> Yo mama's glasses are so thick that when she looks on a map, she sees people waving. <br> Yo mama's so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and came out with a job application. <br> Yo Mama is so ugly, she walked out of the pet store and the alarm went off. <br> ...


0 Comments, 36 Views, 0 Votes
Sunflower_33 44 F
1  Article
What is a woman?   12/31/2004

FEMALE ANALYSIS <br> Women--Chemical Analysis Element: Women Symbol: WO <br> Discovered by: ADAM <br> Atomic Weight: Average expected as 118, but there are known isotopes ranging from 100 to 160, with highly radioactive occurrences at 250 and better (avoid at all costs). <br> Occurrence: Surplus quantities in all urban areas. (except ...


0 Comments, 98 Views, 5 Votes ,5.75 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
FOUR BROTHERS   12/30/2004

Four brothers left home for college, and soon they became successful doctors and lawyers and prospered. <br> Several years later, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who lived far away in another city. <br> The first said, "I had a big house built for Mama." The second said, " I had a ...


0 Comments, 76 Views, 5 Votes ,3.14 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
How smart are you?   12/28/2004

Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying; "If you don't use it, you will lose it" also applies to the brain, so....... Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence. So take the following test presented here and determine if you are losing it or are still "with ...


0 Comments, 56 Views, 2 Votes ,3.12 Score
A Riddle   12/28/2004

Why is semen white and piss yellow?????? <br> <br> <br> So you know whether you are coming or going!


1 Comments, 118 Views, 5 Votes ,2.82 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
Definitions   12/28/2004

1. ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonalds <br> 2. AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tried to do <br> 3. BERNADETTE: The act of torching a mortgage <br> 4. BURGLARIZE: What a crook sees with <br> 5. CONTROL: A short, ugly inmate <br> 6. COUNTERFEITERS: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets ! <br> 7. ...


1 Comments, 30 Views, 4 Votes ,2.47 Score
Do you know how to find a sexy frog ?   12/27/2004

>>>Look under a horny toad.


0 Comments, 17 Views, 6 Votes ,0.23 Score
the2ofus1964 44 C
3  Articles
Talking clock   12/25/2004

There was a drunk showing some friends his new apartment.He was showing them his bedroom and there was a brass gong next to his bed.One friend asks what the gong ws for.The drunk says it a talking clock.The friends were curious as to how it worked.So the drunk picks up a mallet and hits the gong with ear shattering sound.Suddenly from the other side of the wall someone screams[ IT'S 3 ...


0 Comments, 463 Views, 105 Votes ,4.90 Score
Name the Plays   12/25/2004

The following represents six plays written by William Shakespeare. Can you name them? <br> WET, DRY, MISCARRIAGE, 3", 6", 12" <br> <br> give up? <br> <br> wet is A Midsummer Night's Dream dry is The Twelfth Night miscarriage is Loves Labour Lost 3" is Much Ado About Nothing 6" is As You Like It 12" is Taming of the Shrew


1 Comments, 247 Views, 60 Votes ,0.52 Score
a hound barking   12/24/2004

Jhone very like to hunting. He had a very good experience with a special hound. The very fast to pickup goose at past years. <br> When he visit the hunting field again this year. He requesting to rent this again. The filed owner told him this will charge you more money from this year. <br> John said, yes, no problem. John ride to hunt goose. He felt very ...


0 Comments, 256 Views, 38 Votes
rm_percy6939 84 C
1  Article
Penis   12/24/2004

Man and a lady dancing the old way holding each other. He says to her my dear have you ever seen a penis before? she says "no I have never seen a penis what is one of those? he dances to an alcove and says again "are you sure you have never seen a penis before? she says " I promise i have never seen a penis. With that the man unzips his flys and lobs out his dick, "that my dear is a ...


2 Comments, 344 Views, 37 Votes ,4.51 Score
nice legs!!   12/24/2004

A young man who was running away from the MP's because he didn't want to go to the war in Iraq came across a nun. "May I hide under your skirt please?" Reluctantely the nun agrees and lets him under her skirt. Two MP's stop when they see the nun and ask her if she saw anyone go running by. "He went that way sir" she answered. "Thanks!" and the MP's took off after the young man. The man ...


1 Comments, 434 Views, 93 Votes ,6.24 Score
rm_HockeyAddict 29 M
1  Article
x-mas joke   12/23/2004

Why doesn't Santa Claus have any ? <br> Cause he only comes once a year!


0 Comments, 64 Views, 10 Votes ,1.99 Score
rm_fitforlife57 63 M
11  Articles
Christmas Trees   12/22/2004

Two blondes decided to go into the forest to cut their own Christmas trees. After several hours battling through the snow and fighting off wolves, one said to the other "fuck it, I'm cutting down the next tree I see whether it has decorations on it or not"


0 Comments, 199 Views, 20 Votes ,4.02 Score
rm_fitforlife57 63 M
11  Articles
Memories   12/22/2004

Two old guys in a nursing home were talking to each other and one said "you that young nurse with the beautiful body and great tits", "yeah" said his mate. "She came into my room last night and did a slow strip and was completely naked in front of me" His mate said "what did you do" The other replied "I couldn't think so I just started singing "memories, of the things we left ...


0 Comments, 228 Views, 26 Votes ,4.32 Score
rm_supersport82 39 M
1  Article
mickey and minni   12/22/2004

mickey and minni are getting a devorce and the devorce councler is talking to minni first and then brings in mickey at starts out saying i just don't see it minni isn't crazy. mickey replys I never said she was I said she was fucking goofy.


2 Comments, 207 Views, 35 Votes ,3.41 Score
ARE YOU A TRUE MINNESOTAN?   12/21/2004

THIS IS JEFF FOXWORTHY'S IDEA ABOUT A TRUE MINNESOTAN <br> 1. " VACATION" MEANS GOING NORTH OR SOUTH OF 35W FOR THE WEEKEND <br> 2. YOU MEASURE DISTANCE IN HOURS <br> 3. YOU KNOW SEVERAL PEOPLE WHO HAVE HIT A DEER MORE THAN ONCE <br> 4. YOU OFTEN SWITCH HEAT TO A/C IN THE SAME DAY AND BACK AGAIN <br> 5. YOU CAN DRIVE 65 THROUGH 2 FEET OF ...


0 Comments, 109 Views, 14 Votes ,2.66 Score
rm_HIMNHER77 40 C
3  Articles
Creation of pussy   12/21/2004

Seven wise men with knowledge so fine, Created pussy to their design, First was a carpenter strong and bold, With his hammer and chisel he gave it a hole, Second was a butcher smart with wit, With his knife he gave it a slit, Third was a hunter short and stout, With fox fur he lined it without, Fourth was a taylor tall and thin, With red velvet he lined it within, Fifth was a ...


0 Comments, 215 Views, 19 Votes ,3.78 Score
Yet **More** Blonde Jokes   12/21/2004

Q: How do you get a blonde to drown herself? <br> A: Put a scratch 'n sniff perfume sample on the bottom of a swimming pool. <br> <br> Next: <br> Two blondes went shopping one day in the one blonde's new BMW convertible. As they exited the mall, the owner of the car said, "Oh, no! I locked my keys in the car!" <br> Her friend ...


2 Comments, 199 Views, 14 Votes ,4.58 Score
nhfarmboy01 37 C
0  Articles
night before christmas   12/20/2004

It was the night before christmas and all thru the house, everyone felt shitty, even the mouse. Dad at the whorehouse, mam smokin' grass, I just settled down for a nice piece of ass. When out on the lawn there rose such a clatter, I sprang from my piece to see whats the matter. He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell, I knew right away that fat fucker fell. He filled all the ...


3 Comments, 151 Views, 46 Votes ,2.87 Score
AznGirl8o8 38 F
3  Articles
An offer she cant refuse   12/20/2004

A ladder was placed against the bedroom window of a burning house, and a young fireman rushed up. Inside was a curvy brunette in a see-through nightie. <br> "Aha, " said he, "You're the second pregnant girl I've rescued this year!" <br> "But I'm not pregnant, " indignantly exclaimed the brunette. <br> "You're not rescued yet either."


3 Comments, 123 Views, 23 Votes ,4.65 Score
AznGirl8o8 38 F
3  Articles
women vs. men in the shower   12/20/2004

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN: Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg ...


0 Comments, 107 Views, 31 Votes ,6.50 Score
AznGirl8o8 38 F
3  Articles
bondage   12/20/2004

One day mom was cleaning juniors room and in the closet she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her with out a word. So she asked him, "What should we do about this?" Dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."


2 Comments, 155 Views, 38 Votes ,5.73 Score
rm_fitforlife57 63 M
11  Articles
Crotchless Undies   12/20/2004

Wife comes home with new crutchless undies and hubby is on the couch with a beer in hand. Wife puts one foot on to the arm-rest and says "how would you like some of this". Hubby has a look and says "get fucked, look what it's done to your undies".


0 Comments, 95 Views, 23 Votes ,4.18 Score
rm_fitforlife57 63 M
11  Articles
Vietnam Vet   12/20/2004

How many Vietnam Veterans does it take to change a light bulb. “HOW THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW, YOU WEREN’T THERE.


1 Comments, 59 Views, 22 Votes ,0.24 Score
Little boy and girl playing doctor   12/17/2004

A little boy and girl are playing doctor. They are naked and looking at each others' genitals. The boy says, "Look, I've got a penis and you don't." The girl says "I have a vagina." He says, "Don't you wish you had a penis?" The girl says, "I don't need one. With one of these I can have as many of those as I want."


1 Comments, 47 Views, 16 Votes ,2.83 Score
Doing The Dishes   12/17/2004

Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but its missing a seal, so whenever it rains he has to smear Vaseline over the spot where the seal should be. Anyway, his girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents. He drives his new bike to her house, where she is outside waiting for him. "No matter what happens at dinner tonight, don't say a ...


3 Comments, 36 Views, 17 Votes ,3.27 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
Is it male or female?   12/16/2004

You may not know that many non-living things have a gender; <br> For example... <br> 1) Ziploc Bags -- are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. <br> 2) Copiers -- are Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can ...


1 Comments, 27 Views, 5 Votes ,4.45 Score
SensualFriend4us 68 C
38  Articles
Marital Problems   12/16/2004

A woman and her husband who are having troubles being sexually interested in each other decide to go see a sexual therapist. After a pyscial examination and interviewing them therapist says that they can be helped if they will follow the following instructions. <br> He tells them that they are to go home, and that night she is to take a glazed donut and impale it on his ...


0 Comments, 58 Views, 17 Votes ,1.99 Score
SensualFriend4us 68 C
38  Articles
Gay Yuppies.   12/16/2004

Any one hear about the two gay yuppies? Gerald fits John, and John fits Gerald.


2 Comments, 27 Views, 13 Votes ,0.63 Score
rm_LadyJ1959 64 F
3  Articles
How to live longer   12/14/2004

A man asks his Doctor how to live longer, Doctor asks him: U smoke? "no" U drink "no" U gamble "no" U love sex "no" Then what the fuck U want to live so longg for?


1 Comments, 22 Views, 21 Votes ,4.73 Score
SensualFriend4us 68 C
38  Articles
Blond Photography   12/14/2004

Guy is married to this beautiful if somewhat slow witted blond. He comes home from work one evening during a HUGE thunder storm to find his wife running around the yard in the pouring down rain, stopping occassionally to strike poses as the lightening flashes about her. Confused he runs over to ask her what she's doing outside in this weather to which she replies, "isn't it wonderful, ...


0 Comments, 31 Views, 35 Votes ,1.39 Score
Clinton and Dubya   12/14/2004

Clinton and Bush are marooned on a desserted island. One day a rubber raft floats up on shore and laying in the raft is a beautiful, naked sleeping woman. Clinton turns to Bush and says "Lets screw her" and Bush says " Out of what?"


2 Comments, 59 Views, 9 Votes ,4.71 Score
rm_theaxman 54 M
3  Articles
Ugly pick up artist   12/14/2004

A man is sitting in a bar accross from an incredibly beautiful woman. Pretty soon the ugliest guy he has ever seen sits down and starts talking to her. After just a few minutes they get up together and leave. The next week he is in the same bar and another beutiful woman is sitting at the bar and the same thing happens. The incredibly ugly man sits down talks with her for a couple of ...


1 Comments, 82 Views, 31 Votes ,3.14 Score
morning wood   12/13/2004

Whats it called when a man wakes up with a hard-on? <br> Morning thickness


1 Comments, 8 Views, 0 Votes
buzzzzz   12/13/2004

One day a young man and woman were in their bedroom making love. All of a sudden a bumble bee entered the bedroom window. As the young lady parted her legs the bee entered her vagina. The woman started screaming "Oh my god, help me, there's a bee in my vagina!" The husband immediately took her to the local doctor and explained the situation. <br> The doctor thought for ...


0 Comments, 51 Views, 17 Votes ,5.81 Score
Harrassment   12/13/2004

A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very close to her, draws in a large breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice. <br> After a week of this she can't stand it any longer! The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why. <br> The supervisor is ...


1 Comments, 31 Views, 19 Votes ,4.84 Score
The two ants ***   12/12/2004

There are two ants living in a girl's pair of panties. One day they decide to go exploring in the caves. They said to meet back in the same spot in and hour. So, one ant went in one cave, and the other ant in a different cave. After an hour went by, the two ants met back up. One ant was covered in brown, sticky, smelly stuff. "Eeew!, What was your cave like" asked the other ant. ...


0 Comments, 29 Views, 17 Votes ,1.85 Score
FL_Scorpio 43 M
10  Articles
Mr. Brown.   12/11/2004

Mr. Brown the old history teacher had a dirty mouth. He was always saying something off color or suggestive. One day after class, Sally approaches his desk with a flock of girls in tow. "Mr. Brown, " she said, "We are tired of your filthy remarks and we aren't going to put up with in anymore! The next time you say something nasty in class, we are all going to complain to the principal." ...


0 Comments, 28 Views, 26 Votes ,2.70 Score
RUN2644 66 C
106  Articles
Ahhh....Tequila!   12/10/2004

A guy walks into a bar and notices a very large jar on the counter and sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. The man guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it! <br> He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's with the jar?" "Well, you pay ten dollars ... and IF you pass three tests, you get all the money!!!" The man certainly isn't going to pass this up! ...


2 Comments, 40 Views, 14 Votes ,5.22 Score
why does peater pan fly   12/7/2004

why does peater pan fly if your peter was hit with a pan youd fly 2


0 Comments, 9 Views, 5 Votes
say the darndest things   12/5/2004

Yesterday, my neighbor was reading a 's book about animals to her grandson, little Bubba, who just turned 3 a few months ago. "This is a pig. What sound does a piggy make?" <br> "Oink ! Oink!" said little Bubba. <br> "This is a cow and what sound does a cow make?" <br> "Moo! Moo!" said little Bubba. <br> "This is a ducky and what sound does ...


1 Comments, 43 Views, 8 Votes ,1.16 Score
What would YOU like for Christmas?   12/5/2004

A little boy sits on Santa's lap. Santa says "I bet I know what you want for Christmas, " and with his finger he taps the boys nose with every letter he spells "T-O-Y-S". <br> The little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have enough toys." <br> Santa replies once again tapping the boys nose with every letter, "C-A-N-D-Y." <br> Again the little boy ...


2 Comments, 35 Views, 8 Votes ,3.25 Score
Sleep studies   12/5/2004

What your sleeping position says about you! <br> According to a new article in 'Cosmopolitan' magazine, they say the position you sleep in says a lot about you. <br> They say women who sleep on their sides are sensitive, women who sleep on their stomachs are competent, and women who sleep on their backs with their ankles behind their ears are very popular.


0 Comments, 43 Views, 19 Votes ,2.73 Score
thief75 48 M
2  Articles
Little Johnny   12/4/2004

Little Johnny has to take a piss so he hads to the public John to go. <br> As he is pissing a sailor walks in and starts ppissing next to Johnny. <br> Johnny looks up at the sailor and asks, "Are you a REAL sailor?" <br> the sailor replies, "I sure am." <br> Johnny then asks, "Can I wear your hat?" <br> And the Sailor says, "Suuure" ...


2 Comments, 29 Views, 21 Votes ,4.12 Score
A defendants plea   11/30/2004

"So let me get this straight, " the prosecutor says to the defendant, "you came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man." <br> "That's correct, " says the defendant. <br> "Upon which, " continues the prosecutor, "you take out a pistol and shoot your wife, killing her." <br> "That's correct, " says the defendant. <br> "Then ...


1 Comments, 13 Views, 6 Votes ,5.36 Score
Here's a Great *ucking Commentary.   11/30/2004

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "*uck". It is the magical word which, just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate. <br> In language, "*uck" falls into many Grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb both transitive (John *ucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was *ucked by John). <br> It ...


4 Comments, 13 Views, 7 Votes ,4.06 Score
blackdude79 43 M
4  Articles
Something's wrong somewhere   11/29/2004

After 9 years of sex in the dark, a wife discovers her husband was using a vibrator. She asks for an explanation, he says, "I'll explain the vibrator, but you first explain the !"


1 Comments, 27 Views, 2 Votes ,5.20 Score
blackdude79 43 M
4  Articles
Open question...   11/29/2004

HEIGHT OF UNEMPLOYMENT: Cobwebs in the pussy of a . <br> HEIGHT OF TECHNOLOGY: A condom with a zip. <br> HEIGHT OF SOPHISTICATION: Sucking nipples with a straw. <br> Now, what's yours?


1 Comments, 14 Views, 1 Votes ,1.10 Score
blackdude79 43 M
4  Articles
Oops!   11/29/2004

MESSAGE FROM TOCARO CLINIC: <br> Sir, we regret to inform you that the redness on your penis was not cancer; it was lipstick. We deeply regret the pointless amputation and would like you to contact us so we can suggest an alternative.


1 Comments, 24 Views, 4 Votes ,5.19 Score
Recreation   11/28/2004

What's the BEST thing about fucking 29 year olds? <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> There's twenty of them.


1 Comments, 7 Views, 18 Votes
rm_dolphin510 37 F
7  Articles
Sales Assistant   11/27/2004

A new sales assistant was hired at a large dept. store. On his first day, the sales manager took him around to show him the ropes. They were passing by the gardening section, when they heard a customer asking for grass seed. The sales manager stepped in and said, "Excuse me, but will you be needing a hose to water your lawn?" <br> The customer replied, "I guess so. I'll take ...


2 Comments, 30 Views, 26 Votes ,7.02 Score
busy blonde   11/27/2004

how do u keep a blonde busy for hours??? Scroll Down for answer...... <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> ...


0 Comments, 33 Views, 23 Votes ,4.18 Score
hottygirl555324 52 F
10  Articles
The 10 most important people in a Women's life   11/26/2004

1. The doctor because he say's, "Take off your clothes" 2. The dentist because he say's "Open Wide" 3. The hairdresser because he say's "Do you want it teased or blown" 4. The milkman because he say's "Do you want it in the front or the back" 5. The Interior Decorator because he say's "Once you have it all in, you'll love it" 6.The banker because he say's, "If you take it out you'll lose ...


1 Comments, 52 Views, 31 Votes ,5.64 Score
rm_Hrd4YouAll 56 M
2  Articles
A man's 80th Birthday present...   11/25/2004

A man's doorbell rings on his 80th birthday. He answers the door to find a beautiful woman in her 30's, dressed to kill and looking stunning. She says, "Hi, your friend Saul sent me as your Birthday present. Are you ready for some super sex?" <br> He replies, "Well, now that you ask... I think I'd like the soup."


0 Comments, 33 Views, 19 Votes ,3.39 Score
rm_tazmantenn 74 M
2172  Articles
I was crying by the end   11/24/2004

> >>If you can read this whole story without laughing then there's no hope > >>for you. I was crying by the end. > >> > > > > >>Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to > >>the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better. > >>For those of you who have lived in Texas, ...


0 Comments, 37 Views, 17 Votes ,4.96 Score
dygara 56 M
12  Articles
Huh.   11/21/2004

There was a class and each student had to go up to the front of the class and say a sentence using one of their spelling words. First Juan goes up and his word was love so he says, "Sara says she loves me". Then it's Chase's turn and his word is hate. So he goes up and says, "Sara says she hates me". Then it's Chris's turn and his word is dictate. So he goes up to the frount ...


1 Comments, 10 Views, 3 Votes ,5.39 Score
Wanna Know What "SOMETHING" Is?   11/20/2004

"Something" is when you grab around your dick at the bottom with one hand and then grab it with the other hand above it, and there is still two inches sticking out the top! NOW THAT IS SOMETHING! <br> <br> <br> If you do that when you cock is soft that's "AMAZING"


1 Comments, 49 Views, 20 Votes ,3.38 Score
SlavePandora 58 F
20  Articles
You'll be punished   11/18/2004

Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in. <br> "I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding ...


0 Comments, 27 Views, 9 Votes ,5.78 Score
rm_RebelRoka67 52 M
10  Articles
labour pains!!!   11/16/2004

A married couple rushed to the hospital because the woman was in labor the doctor asked the couple, "I have invented a new machine that you might want to try, it takes some of the labor pains away from the mother and gives it to the father." So the married couple decided that they would try this. So the doctor hooked the machine up and put it on 10% of pain switched from the mother to the ...


1 Comments, 19 Views, 4 Votes ,3.25 Score
rm_shemaleVIDA 60 F
14  Articles
A Definition about what a Gay AOL member is all about   11/15/2004

A Definition about what a Gay Aol'er is all about <br> Basic Facts - The defining key words <br> TOTALLY TOP 1) I have masculinity and control issues 2) I'm ugly and since most gay men are bottoms, I can hopefully get laid this way. <br> <br> <br> <br> TOTALLY BOTTOM 1) I'm selfish and lazy. 2) I was never properly toilet trained. 3) ...


0 Comments, 107 Views, 13 Votes ,2.98 Score
Superman   11/11/2004

Superman was flying around town when he flew over Wonder Woman's penthouse. She was laying outside completely naked. Superman thought to himself "I am faster than a speeding bullet, I could fly down there and have my way with her and she wouldn't even know what happened". So he flew down and fucked her. Then flew away. "What the fuck was that?" Wonder Woman said. "I don't know" said the ...


1 Comments, 9 Views, 24 Votes ,7.67 Score
rm_lonelyboi33 38 M
1  Article
what do Michael Jackson and Wall-Mart have in common   11/10/2004

(Q) WHAT DO MICHAEL JACKSON AND WALL-MART HAVE IN COMMON? <br> (A) THEY BOTH HAVE BOY'S UNDERWEAR HALF OFF


0 Comments, 3 Views, 18 Votes ,4.90 Score
black and white   11/9/2004

whats black and white, black and white, black and white........... <br> <br> a nun rolling down a hill


2 Comments, 21 Views, 11 Votes ,2.23 Score
Long but funny (if you're not a cop)   11/9/2004

A guy is driving down a long country lane at 100mph, a police officer is at the side of the road with a radar gun and catches the guy speeding, he follows and signals the guy to stop. When he gets over to the car he asks the guy why he was speeding, the man replies that he'd been fishing all day and he'd lost track of time and if he didn't get home soon his wife would staple his balls to ...


1 Comments, 13 Views, 4 Votes ,5.57 Score
barney72003 50 M
7  Articles
Pumkin Shagger   11/8/2004

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male resident of Dacula, Georgia, in a pumpkin patch 11:38 p.m. on Friday. <br> Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday. <br> The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he ...


1 Comments, 8 Views, 11 Votes ,5.04 Score
The Good Excuse.   11/3/2004

A man goes to work one morning, only to find that his secretary is sick so he calls the secretary pool to get another one for the day. A little while later, in walks a pretty blonde with huge tits, he smiles to himself then proceeds with the business of the day. <br> After a long day of work, he was feeling bad for keeping her late, so he offered to take her to dinner. At ...


2 Comments, 114 Views, 25 Votes ,7.23 Score
bamaguy37 57 M
9  Articles
blonde wreck   11/2/2004

a blonde has a wreck she gets out of the car opens the trunk 2 migets get out in trench coats and start exposing themselfs to on comeing trafic it6 wasint long till there were wreckes everywhere the cops show up and ask her what the hell is going on she said i had a wreck the cop ask well whats with the 2 migets she say well thems my emergancy flashers


1 Comments, 52 Views, 19 Votes ,5.50 Score
rm_dave242349 67 M
41  Articles
How to keep a woman happy   11/1/2004

It's not difficult. To make a woman happy a man only needs to be: <br> A friend <br> A companion <br> A lover <br> A brother <br> A father <br> A master <br> A chef <br> An electrician <br> A carpenter <br> A plumber <br> A mechanic <br> A decorator <br> A stylist ...


0 Comments, 9 Views, 19 Votes ,5.23 Score
Arkansas   10/31/2004

What do a grizzly bear and a girl from Arkansas have in common? They both suck their paws


1 Comments, 19 Views, 3 Votes ,1.96 Score
rm_LivingTea 60 C
2  Articles
Cabbie pics up a nun   10/28/2004

A cabbie picks up a Nun. <br> She gets into the cab, and the cab driver won't stop staring at her. <br> She asks him why is he staring. He replies, "I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you." She answers, "My , you cannot offend me. When you are as old as I am and have been a Nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about ...


2 Comments, 620 Views, 89 Votes ,7.44 Score
nitehawker 53 M
4  Articles
kinky or perverted   10/28/2004

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? <br> Kinky is using a feather, perverted is using the whole chicken!


1 Comments, 12 Views, 1 Votes ,3.70 Score
Out of Office Replies   10/27/2004

Phrases For Your “Out-Of-The-Office” E-Mail Auto-Reply, you can chose from!! <br> I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. <br> When I return, please refer to me as ‘Loretta’ instead of ‘Steve’.’ <br> I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the ...


1 Comments, 25 Views, 5 Votes ,5.43 Score
A bear and ...   10/26/2004

A bear and a rabbit was takin' a shit in da woods, then the bear turned to the rabbit and asked: "Hey rabbit, d'you mind if shit is sticking to ya fur??" The rabbit looked at the bear and said: "Ummm....no....not really.." <br> And then....the bear....wiped his ass with the RABBIT!! ;o)


0 Comments, 5 Views, 7 Votes
supersly2004 50 M
9  Articles
why ladies should keep knickers on...   10/25/2004

Was standing with a friend, one sunny afternoon, and along comes this sexy lady, when she walked past, i said to my pal, i wonder why she wears no knickers, of which he replied, how do i know ...she wears no knickers. I said, i saw dandruff on her feet, when she walked past. had she been wearing knickers......................winks


1 Comments, 40 Views, 17 Votes ,1.15 Score
cangoallnight67 54 M
2  Articles
math quiz anyone?   10/25/2004

whats the square route of 69? 8 something


1 Comments, 12 Views, 3 Votes ,1.47 Score
rm_SexySaultCpl 50 C
4  Articles
Degenerate Dictionary   10/24/2004

3-Eyed Turtle Basically plug every orifice of a girl in the following manner: thumb in ass, fingers in pussy, and dick in mouth. <br> 3-Way Lunch Anytime you got three women laid out on your bed begging for some hot muff action. Happens all the time to men in the Miami club scene. Requires much patience. <br> 6 Pack Have that bitch stand on her head, and stick your ...


3 Comments, 296 Views, 24 Votes ,4.38 Score
nadine_kansas 44 F
0  Articles
what's wrinkled and rides a ?   10/24/2004

the lone prune.


0 Comments, 53 Views, 2 Votes ,0.34 Score
rm_sensualKatie 51 F
2  Articles
The Art Expert   10/21/2004

A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery was staring at a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three very black, totally naked men sitting on a bench. Two of the figures had black penises but the one in the middle had a pink penis. <br> The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and ...


2 Comments, 120 Views, 32 Votes ,6.71 Score
MSU Football players   10/14/2004

How many MSU freshmen football players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Answer: None! That is a Sophmore level course! .


2 Comments, 30 Views, 5 Votes ,1.19 Score
kinkydetroitcpl2 50 C
13  Articles
girl who drank too much   10/13/2004

This lovely young lady started showing up at the tavern where I work. She was blonde and well stacked and all the men smiled as she walked by.She proceeded too order budwiesers all night long until she past out.A few of the guys dragged her into the back room and had a turn with her.After 5 guys fucked her brains out they drug her back into the bar and left. The next weekend she was back at the ...


2 Comments, 81 Views, 12 Votes ,5.10 Score
anagramania   10/12/2004

Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble. (wait till you see the last one)! DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT GEORGE BUSH: When you rearrange the letters: HE BUGS GORE THE MORSE CODE: ...


0 Comments, 141 Views, 16 Votes ,6.21 Score
BABYFACE2430 41 M
2  Articles
daddy why?   10/11/2004

i father and his go fishing as they are fishing the dad lights up a cig his asks daddy can i try to smoke to NO you're to young why daddy does your dick reach your asshole no then you're not old enough then the dad opens a beer the asks dad can i try the beer NO you're to young why daddy does your dick reach your asshole no then you're not old enough on the way home they ...


2 Comments, 49 Views, 5 Votes ,5.10 Score
cucumber/pickle/and a penis?   10/9/2004

There was a cucumber, a pickle, and a penis sitting around talking about how their lives sucked. The cucumber complains, "Man, my life sucks. When I get big, fat, and juicy, they cut me up and stick me on a salad." The pickle looked at him and said, "You think you have it bad? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they drown me in vinegar, put spices on me, and stick me in a jar." The penis finally ...


1 Comments, 28 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
The bottle   10/9/2004

A man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant and while sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting all alone at a nearby table. He calls the waiter over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot to be sent over to her, knowing that, if she accepts it, she is his. The waiter gets the bottle and quickly brings it over to the woman, saying this is from the gentleman over ...


1 Comments, 34 Views, 2 Votes ,5.20 Score
sweetdwilly55 63 M
3  Articles
A REALLLY Bad Pun   10/8/2004

Q: What do you get when you cross a honeydew with sheepdog? A: A Melon-Collie baby!


1 Comments, 16 Views, 19 Votes ,0.88 Score
sweetdwilly55 63 M
3  Articles
Hookers and Lawyers   10/7/2004

Q: What are the two main differences between hookers and lawyers? 1: There some things hookers will not do no matter how much you pay them. 2: Hookers stop screwing their when they die.


1 Comments, 17 Views, 2 Votes ,1.04 Score
topper451 75 M
7  Articles
The cuckoo clock   10/5/2004

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls". I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the hours passes and the margaritas went down way too easy. Around 3AM, a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed ...


1 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes
topper451 75 M
7  Articles
Job application question   10/5/2004

A company was looking to hire someone for an important position, so they interviewed dozens of applicants and narrowed their search down to three people. In an attempt to pick one of them, they decided to give them all the same question to answer within 24 hours and the one with the best answer would get the job. The question was: A man and a woman are in bed, nude. The woman is lying on her side ...


1 Comments, 23 Views, 0 Votes
sweetdwilly55 63 M
3  Articles
Old Bob   10/4/2004

A prospector ambles into saloon in a small town on the edge of the Mojave desert, and orders a shot and a beer. The prospector then asks the bartender: "You got any women in this here town?" The bartender replies: "No, but we got old Bob in back." The prospector says :" I don't go for that shit" He leaves the saloon, gets on his mule and heads up to the hills. 1 year later same prospector, ...


1 Comments, 47 Views, 1 Votes ,2.40 Score
sweetdwilly55 63 M
3  Articles
W.VA   10/4/2004

Q: How do they celebrate Halloween in West Virginia? A: They pumpkin!!!


1 Comments, 20 Views, 1 Votes ,2.40 Score
topper451 75 M
7  Articles
Wallmart Greeters   9/28/2004

Two elderly Wal-Mart greeters were sitting on a bench during break time and >one turns to the other asking, "Jim, I'm 73 years old and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you are >about my age. How do you feel?' Jim says, " I feel just like a new born babe." Rather amazed his coworker repeats his statement in the form of a question, "Really? A new born babe???" "Yup", ...


1 Comments, 20 Views, 0 Votes
topper451 75 M
7  Articles
Brains   9/28/2004

A three year old little boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath. <br> "Mama, " he asked, "Are these my brains?" <br> Mama answered, "Not yet."


1 Comments, 14 Views, 0 Votes
topper451 75 M
7  Articles
Brains   9/28/2004

A three year old little boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath. "Mama," he asked, "Are these my brains?" Mama answered, "Not yet."


1 Comments, 29 Views, 0 Votes
rm_badprince06 30 M
17  Articles
Getting F-CKED   9/27/2004

There are 3 dudes and a woman on a island. The woman has no arms or legs. So she tells the 1st dude Ive never been hugged before so he hugs her. 1 hour later she tells the 2nd dude Ive never been kissed before so he kisses her. Another hour later she tells the 3rd dude Ive never been f-cked before so he picks her up walks over to the ocean and throws her in and says now your F-CKED...


1 Comments, 23 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
rm_badprince06 30 M
17  Articles
Sugar Sweet!   9/27/2004

A professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A young female (freshman) raised her hand and asked, `If I understand, you`re saying there is a lot of glucose in male semen as in sugar?` `That`s correct,` responded the professor, going on to add statistical information. Raising her hand again, the girl asked, `Then why doesn`t it taste sweet?` After a stunned silence, the ...


1 Comments, 15 Views, 0 Votes
rm_badprince06 30 M
17  Articles
Misdewiener   9/27/2004

Lorena Bobbitt's sister Louella was arrested yesterday for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable ...


1 Comments, 16 Views, 0 Votes
rm_badprince06 30 M
17  Articles
Honey, pack your bags!   9/27/2004

A woman gets home, screeches her car into the driveway, runs into the house, slams the door and shouts at the top of her lungs... "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband says, "Holy Sh*t! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she says. "Just get the hell out."


1 Comments, 10 Views, 0 Votes
rm_badprince06 30 M
17  Articles
THE MAGICIAN   9/27/2004

A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. He had a different audience each week, so he allowed himself to perform the same act over and over again. There was only one problem. The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of every show, "Look, that's not ...


1 Comments, 22 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
rm_badprince06 30 M
17  Articles
The Stingy Husband   9/27/2004

There was a man who had worked all of his life and had saved all of his money. He was a real miser when it came to his money. He loved money more than just about anything, and just before he died, he said to his wife, "Now listen, when I die I want you to take all my money and place it in the casket with me. Because I wanna take my money to the after life." So he got his wife ...


1 Comments, 16 Views, 0 Votes
talcum powder   9/26/2004

>One morning a husband took a pair of underwear out of the drawer. "What the hell?" he said to himself as a little "dust" cloud appeared when >he shook them out. "April, " he hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum powder in >my underwear?" She shot back, "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'." > > >Go ahead and laugh


1 Comments, 23 Views, 26 Votes ,7.02 Score
rm_douwantitido 60 M
1  Article
Jack & Jill   9/23/2004

Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill's fanny, Jack got a shock & a mouth full of cock cus Jill's a fucking tranny.


1 Comments, 84 Views, 23 Votes ,2.89 Score
precious0778 71 C
9  Articles
Firm It Up   9/23/2004

One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife, pinched her on the butt and said, "If you firmed this up, we could get rid of your control-top pantyhose." <br> While this was on the edge of intolerable, she kept silent. <br> The next morning, the man woke his wife with a pinch on each of her breasts and said, "You know, if you firmed these up, we ...


1 Comments, 68 Views, 15 Votes ,6.35 Score
rectum stretcher   9/21/2004

rectum stretcher <br> <br> <br> <br> This guy is flying down the road, and he comes over a bridge. Sure enough, a cop with a radar gun is sitting on the other side of the bridge and pulls him over. <br> The cop walks up to the guy's car and asks, "What's the hurry?" <br> The guy says, "I'm late for ...


1 Comments, 19 Views, 2 Votes ,3.81 Score
rm_lisa1217000 50 C
1  Article
FRIEND vs. BEST FRIEND   9/16/2004

A FRIEND WILL HELP YOU MOVE, YOUR BEST FRIEND WILL HELP YOU MOVE A BODY.


1 Comments, 121 Views, 18 Votes ,2.99 Score
Used car Lot   9/14/2004

> > Used car Lot <<It was a small town and the patrolman was making his evening rounds. As he was checking a used car lot, he came upon two little old ladies sitting in a used car. He stopped and asked them if they were stealing the car. One said, "Heavens no, we bought it today." He said, "Then why don't you drive it away?" The other said "We can't drive." He said, "Then why ...


1 Comments, 25 Views, 3 Votes ,0.98 Score
rm_jedikia69 43 M
10  Articles
God Damned Flies   9/10/2004

A bum in and alley, waving his hands around swearing " god damned flies" When a man of the cloth happens by and is unhappy hearing the lords name used in such a way. "hey there fella dont use the lords name vain like that, dont you know that all things are put on this earth for a reason". Bum; "bah! god damned flies....." "listen" says the preacher" I dont want to lecture you as it ...


1 Comments, 13 Views, 7 Votes ,2.02 Score
WAL-MART Job Application   9/7/2004

WAL-MART Job Application... <br> <br> This is an actual job application that a 75 year old senior submitted to Wal-Mart in Arkansas. And they hired him because he was so honest and funny! <br> NAME: George Martin <br> SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person (or one who'll cooperate). <br> DESIRED POSITION: ...


1 Comments, 28 Views, 77 Votes ,8.35 Score
rm_chevbug 48 M
1  Article
Another blonde joke!   9/4/2004

What does a blonde and a screen door have in common? Answer: The harder you slam them, the looser they get.


1 Comments, 11 Views, 77 Votes ,3.36 Score
Golf Joke   8/26/2004

A guy walks into the emergency room, all beat up, with a 5 iron wrapped around his neck. The nurse sees him and asks, "What happened to you?" "Well, " he says, "it all started innocently enough. My wife and I were golfing at the club, and we both sliced our drives on the fourth hole into a cow pasture. We found my ball right away, but had trouble finding her ball." "Go on, " the nurse ...


1 Comments, 24 Views, 9 Votes ,5.14 Score
how do you kill a blonde   8/25/2004

how do you kill a blonde?put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.


1 Comments, 71 Views, 10 Votes ,4.38 Score
Monica   8/23/2004

Monica Lewinky got out of the shower, looked in the mirror and said, "God, if only I could lose these love handles!" As soon as she said it, lightning ripped across the night sky, the house shook with thunder, and...... <br> her ears fell off.


1 Comments, 18 Views, 22 Votes ,5.29 Score
Small Dicks   8/20/2004

Okay small dicks or dicks less than 4inches does not mean they cant pleaser you they always have there mouth!


0 Comments, 77 Views, 75 Votes
rm_liodlioness 61 F
5  Articles
Jake and Becky   8/20/2004

Jake was dying. His wife, Becky, was maintaining a candlelight vigil by his side. She held his fragile hand, tears running down her face. Her praying roused him from his slumber. He looked up and his pale lips began to move slightly. "Becky my darling, " he whispered. "Hush my love, " she said. "Rest, don't talk." He was insistent. "Becky, " he said in his tired ...


1 Comments, 38 Views, 9 Votes ,3.85 Score
spiicynights 54 C
1  Article
emotion party   8/18/2004

A girl is throwing a party. "Dress up as your favorite emotion." One couple shows up dressed in green. "We're green with envy." Another gouple shows up looking like Smurfs. "We're blue with depression." So a guy shows up, totally naked except for a bowl of custard strapped around his waist. "What emotion are you supposed to be?" asks the surprised hostess. <br> ...


1 Comments, 77 Views, 4 Votes ,4.80 Score
Chrisx619 59 M
2  Articles
How nice!!   8/13/2004

Here is a story about a southern bells have a sip tea one summer afternoon. Lets call them Betty and SueAnn. <br> Betty: You know SueAnn my husband just bought me a new diamond ring, Do you like it?? <br> Sue Ann: "HOW NICE" A few minutes later <br> Betty: You know SueAnn, my husband just bought me a new Lexus, Do You like it?? <br> ...


1 Comments, 32 Views, 10 Votes ,5.58 Score
nola4fun469 62 M
3  Articles
Preist joke   8/8/2004

A priest was giving confessions, when he had to go use the restroom. He saw an alterboy and asked him to come and sit in for him while he was gone. The priest told him to give as many Hail Marys, or Our Father's as he thought was right for the sin. Everything was going fine til a woman came in and confessed to giving her husband a blow-job. The alterboy didn't know what to tell the woman. ...


0 Comments, 43 Views, 24 Votes ,4.83 Score
rm_cntrygrl3d 47 F
2  Articles
Seems innocent enough   8/6/2004

There were three defendants, the D.A. and a Judge. The judge walks into the court room to start proceedings. Judge said "O.k who is my first case?" D.A. says " Miss Roxy Jay" Judge "What is she charged with?" Judge looks down and see the offense. His eyes raise slowly Judge" Miss Jay you are charged with...." He gets a confused look on his face "blowing bubbles in the park????" ...


1 Comments, 163 Views, 6 Votes
2funboy 55 GC
2  Articles
Two Scotts stumble out of a bar...   7/30/2004

Two Scotts stumble out of a bar and see a sheep with it's head stuck in a fence. One guy says to the other, " I think I'll have a go at it!" When he's done, he turns to his buddy and says, " Now it's your turn!" So his friend shrugs his shoulders, drops his pants and sticks his head in the fence!


1 Comments, 317 Views, 31 Votes ,4.49 Score
what's the difference between a blonde and a parrot?   7/10/2004

What is the difference between a blonde and a parrot?? You can teach the parrot to talk, but you can't teach the blonde to shut up!


1 Comments, 7 Views, 15 Votes ,4.36 Score
Pussy Humor   7/6/2004

Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry, " said the first one. "Let's fly down and find some lunch " They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate and ate till they could eat no more "I m so full, I don't think I can fly back up into the tree, " said the first one. "Let's just lay back here and bask in ...


0 Comments, 22 Views, 9 Votes ,3.00 Score
dastardlyangel 41 F
2  Articles
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD   7/1/2004

One night quite late little red was headed over to grandmas house when her mother stoped her at the door. "where do you think you're going? the big bad wolf is out and do you know what he'll if he cathces you?" little red pulled a gun out from her basket and showed it to her mom then continued on her way. A little way down the road she came accross the three little pigs. "what are you ...


1 Comments, 90 Views, 31 Votes ,7.46 Score
rm_ivanik_bg 58 M
7  Articles
Extra Large Condoms   6/30/2004

A woman walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms. He replies, "Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?" She responds, "No, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?


1 Comments, 24 Views, 12 Votes ,4.74 Score
The cucumber,pickle and the penis.....   6/27/2004

There was a cucumber, a pickle, and a penis sitting around talking about how their lives sucked. The cucumber "Man, my life sucks. When I get big, fat, and juicy, they cut me up and stick me on a salad." The pickle looks at him and says, "You think you have it bad? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they stick me in vinegar, put spices on me, and stick me in a jar." The penis looks at him and ...


0 Comments, 61 Views, 34 Votes ,7.37 Score
opeenmcasualfun 61 M
0  Articles
the lone ranger and tonto   6/18/2004

the Lone Ranger and his faithful Indian companion Tonto were out riding range one day when the Indian jumped down off his and put his ear to the ground and said Ugh, Kimosabe, buffalo come!! The lone Ranger looked with amazement and said, "Thats incredible Tonto, how'd you know that?" the Indian replied---"My ear's all sticky!!"


0 Comments, 104 Views, 18 Votes ,2.58 Score
pandarosdesires 59 C
2  Articles
motorcycles and vaseline   6/3/2004

this guy has always dreamed of owning a new motorcycle. one day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to the dealer. after he picks out the perfect bike, the dealer tells him about an old biker trick that will keep the chrome on his new bike free from rust. <br> the dealer tells him that all he has to do is to keep a jar of vaseline handy and put it on the chrome ...


1 Comments, 61 Views, 30 Votes ,7.55 Score
rm_ch2002us 65 M
3  Articles
What Women Think   5/7/2004

A good looking young stud walks up to a women sitting at a bar and leans over to her and says, I'll do anyhting you want me to for 20 Bucks. <br> The Women, reaches into her purse and grabs a 20 dollar bill, then looks deep into the young guy eyes, pressing the 20 into his hand and says....................Clean My House


0 Comments, 34 Views, 43 Votes ,8.53 Score
sexycaroline20 37 F
1  Article
~~~Trouser Snake~~~   4/22/2004

NAME: "Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake) LOCATION: Throughout the world DESCRIPTION: Varying from pink to black. Fangless, with a highly venomous spit. Size varies from 3 to 12 inches, depending on it's mood and subspecies. SYMPTOMS: This snake attacks, mainly women, in the lower front abdomen, resulting in an inconspicuous bump. Then, a severe swelling, followed by excruciating pain ...


0 Comments, 434 Views, 78 Votes ,7.03 Score
snow plow   4/15/2004

How do you change a dish washer into a snow plow? <br> Give her a shovel. <br> Why don't women wear wrist watches? <br> There's a clock on the stove.


1 Comments, 92 Views, 18 Votes ,0.67 Score
youandme2233 59 C
1  Article
3 Presidents   4/14/2004

An American is trying to come back from his vacation in Mexico, when he realizes he’s lost all of his I.D. He says to the Border Patrol officer, “I lost my passport, but I have the presidents tattooed on my ass. Is that proof enough that I’m and American?" The guard agrees to take a look. After examining his tattoo’s, the guard says, “Okay ...


2 Comments, 300 Views, 20 Votes ,3.76 Score
pandarosdesires 59 C
2  Articles
what's fuck'in?   4/13/2004

jr. comes home from school one day and says to his pa "pa what's fuck'in?" pa says "jr. you don't know what fuck'in is?" pa turns to ma and says "ma, it's time we teach jr. bout fuck'in." ma goes into the bedroom and takes off all her clothes and ...


1 Comments, 28 Views, 7 Votes ,1.51 Score
rm_seekin2003 41 C
10  Articles
State Mottos   4/4/2004

State Mottos <br> Alabama: Hell Yes, We Have Electricity <br> Alaska: 11, 623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong! <br> Arizona: But It's A Dry Heat <br> Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything <br> California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda <br> Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother <br> Connecticut: Like ...


0 Comments, 61 Views, 28 Votes ,5.40 Score
frisky2some4u 39 C
6  Articles
why men snore   2/9/2004

Why do men snore when they lay on their backs? Because their balls fall down over their asshole and they get vapor locked.


1 Comments, 9 Views, 63 Votes ,4.14 Score
whip71 50 M
7  Articles
Tupperware   2/6/2004

Q: What do tupperware and a walrus have in common? A: They both like a tight seal.


1 Comments, 6 Views, 20 Votes ,2.36 Score
whip71 50 M
7  Articles
Mother in law   2/6/2004

A man goes on holiday with his wife and mother in law to the holy land, shortly after they arrive the mother in law dies. In grief the man and his wife go to the undertaker to organise the funeral. When they get there the undertaker explains that they can have the body shipped home for a cost of $5000 or a very tasteful service could be done here for a cost of $150. "We'll ship her ...


1 Comments, 147 Views, 26 Votes ,4.00 Score
rm_rowerman18 38 M
2  Articles
nurse blowjobs   2/2/2004

why are nurses so bad at giving blow jobs? <br> they always wait for the swelling to go down.


1 Comments, 22 Views, 53 Votes ,6.61 Score
rm_emilysue4u 50 F
1  Article
The Bar Celebration   2/2/2004

There was a guy who walked into his favorite bar, where he knew the bar tender and vice versa. He said "Hey bartender line me up 10 shots"; well since the bartender knew him he lined him up 10 shots of his favorite drink. The guy drinks one shot right after the other til they were all gone. The bartender said to the guy "Hey what you celebrating?". The guy replied "I got my first blow ...


1 Comments, 39 Views, 9 Votes ,4.28 Score
rm_lwh155 64 M
1  Article
curb service   1/28/2004

There were two vice cops that heard about a new whorehouse that had opened up. So they decided to check it out. It was in an old three story building. One cop decided to stay with the radio in case there was a problem. The other one went in to check the building. They agreed that as the cop checked each floor he would shine his flashlight out the window to show that he was okay and the ...


1 Comments, 26 Views, 3 Votes ,2.94 Score
Adventurer333 56 M
18  Articles
Is he dead?   1/28/2004

A 911 operator received a call from a very distraught man. <br> "Hello? Oh my God! We are out in the woods hunting and Bob just collapsed. I... I think he's dead!" the man exclaimed. <br> "Now sir, " the operator said. "Take a few deep breaths and try to calm down. Now the first thing we have to do is make sure Bob is really dead. Can you do that?" <br> "Yes, ...


1 Comments, 36 Views, 2 Votes ,3.12 Score
The Shot slammer   1/26/2004

A guy was drinking at the bar and another guy comes up and orders a shot and slams it down; then he orders another and does the same thing; then another; and then another....... Finally after 10 shots the slammer stops and pauses. The first guy asks what caused the need to drink so much. The slammer replied " got my first BJ to completion a little while ago". The first guy said " Now that's ...


1 Comments, 44 Views, 4 Votes ,4.41 Score
whip71 50 M
7  Articles
mayonaise   1/24/2004

Q: What's the difference between mayonaise ans sperm? A: Mayonaise does't hit the back of your throat at 50mph.


1 Comments, 12 Views, 1 Votes ,2.40 Score
12do69l8r 61 M
2  Articles
courious old man   1/17/2004

one day an eldery man was sitting on a park bench when a young came up and sat down next to him, the eldery man glanced over to notice the youngsters hair, it was multi-colored, it was orange, red , blue, green, and yellow, the eldery man kept staring at the youngsters hair. finally the youngster got alittle aggrevated at the old mans staring and turned to him and said "Look old man didn't ...


1 Comments, 37 Views, 0 Votes
frankandkeen 58 M
1  Article
Bad joke from downunder   1/14/2004

There were a bunch of sheep herders hanging out with the flock... One of the younger guys says he is really jonesing for a screw. All the olders say just do it with one of the sheep. The young guy considers the ideas, screws his courage and goes off and selects a sheep and has a go... As he is screwing all the older guys are laughing. After he is done the young guys asks if they really ...


1 Comments, 38 Views, 10 Votes ,1.79 Score
The Joke is on Us   1/12/2004

Seems that the joke is on us. Most of the females on this site seem to be here for one thing, play games. They send you a canned response to chat with them on their private e-mail then they try and get you to go to a different site and join up just to view some other photos they posted. Don't think so? Try a little experement, the next time you respond to someone and they reply back with a ...


1 Comments, 39 Views, 65 Votes ,8.00 Score
gr8tguy37 55 M
1  Article
blond joke   12/31/2003

What's the difference between a blond and a mosquito? <br> Atleast when you slap a mosquito it will stop sucking.


1 Comments, 8 Views, 9 Votes ,4.71 Score
rm_4karen 47 C
3  Articles
getting even   12/19/2003

I was talking to one of my coworkers and our sexual preferences, and she told me about this one man she used to work with. On the day he quit he told his boss that he had slept with his . His boss got furious. Then he said, your was better


1 Comments, 117 Views, 8 Votes ,0.93 Score
horny69r4u2 52 M
1  Article
Weeweechu   12/17/2003

Weeweechu <br> One beautiful December evening Huan Cho and his girlfriend Jung Lee were sitting by the side of the ocean. It was a romantic full moon, when Huan Cho said "Hey baby, let's play Weeweechu." <br> "Oh no, not now, lets look at the moon" said Jung Lee. <br> "Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I play Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect ...


2 Comments, 30 Views, 4 Votes ,4.02 Score
Satyr48 75 M
8  Articles
Patient Wife   12/16/2003

A woman goes into a drug store and asks the attendant, "Do you have those oversized comdoms?" The worker replies, "Sure, they're hanging on the end of the rack... Are you sure your husband uses those?" She replies, sadly, "Unfortunately no... but do you mind if I wait around for someone who does?"


2 Comments, 326 Views, 5 Votes ,3.80 Score
rm_vector144 49 M
1  Article
Theatres   12/11/2003

Can anyone name 2 people shot in the back of the head at a theatre? <br> . .. ... ok, almost everyone got Abraham Lincoln...anyone get the other? <br> . .. ... The guy sitting in front of Pee Wee Herman!


1 Comments, 23 Views, 32 Votes ,2.40 Score
SexySlut4play 49 F
0  Articles
Attitude   12/8/2003

A husband to be is walking with his father a few weeks before the wedding... His dad tells him you have to be sure to put your wife in her place now a days... He tells his on your wedding night I want to take off your pants and hand them to your wife, have her put them on... When she complains they dont fit tell her thats right you are the man and you wear the pants in the family, that ...


4 Comments, 785 Views, 99 Votes ,7.49 Score
louisdena 53 M
2  Articles
parts that cant be use   12/7/2003

There is few parts in a guy body that cant be use. A guy have 20 nails that cant be nail, a belley button tath cant be button, 2 balls that cant roll and a cock that cant crow. For girls, they have a part that cant be use to... they have a pussy that cant catch mice.


2 Comments, 44 Views, 27 Votes ,4.29 Score
nobozo3 65 M
6  Articles
Jeopardy question #2   12/5/2003

For $600: <br> The Jeopardy answer is: The Grand Canyon, Licnoln Memorial, and Dolly Parton ....... ....... ....... ....... ....... ....... Name 4 national monuments


2 Comments, 23 Views, 33 Votes ,0.30 Score
nobozo3 65 M
6  Articles
Jeopardy question #3   12/5/2003

For $700 <br> The Jeopardy answer is: Aerosmith, The Rolling Stones, and Hari Krishnas ...... ...... ...... ...... ...... What are 2 rock groups, and a group of rocks?


1 Comments, 42 Views, 21 Votes
nobozo3 65 M
6  Articles
Jeopardy Question #4   12/5/2003

For $800 <br> The Jeopardy answer is: A rook, a pawn, and Dolly Parton ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... Name two chess pieces, and a piece with 2 chests


2 Comments, 12 Views, 18 Votes ,1.08 Score
nobozo3 65 M
6  Articles
Final Jeopardy   12/5/2003

Your Final Jeopardy answer is: <br> An eagle, Pee Wee Herman, and Osama Bin Laden .......... .......... .......... .......... <br> Name a bird, a nerd, and a turd.


2 Comments, 15 Views, 20 Votes ,1.85 Score
nobozo3 65 M
6  Articles
Farmer in the city   12/5/2003

A farmer walks into a New York City bar, carrying a bucket of manure, a shotgun, and a dead cat. Well, the bartender thought he had seen it all until this! He didn't wan't to upset the farmer, so he figured he would play along. <br> "What can I get you?", asked the bartender. "Why, I'll have me one of those fancy beers I heard so much about", the farmer replied. The farmer then ...


2 Comments, 39 Views, 30 Votes ,5.69 Score
nobozo3 65 M
6  Articles
Strangers on a train   12/5/2003

Everyday, Tony takes the train to work. And, everyday, a Frenchman sits next to him. At least twice during each trip, the Frenchman would take his right index finger to his nose, and say, "Fifi". Well, one day Tony had to ask why the Frenchman did that. "You see", said the Frenchman, "I love my wife, Fifi, very much. So, everday before I go to work, I stick my finger up her. Then, whenever ...


1 Comments, 39 Views, 29 Votes ,3.44 Score
Love or Lust   12/3/2003

A girl comes home after curfew only to find her mother waiting up for her when she turns on the light. Disgusted, the young girl says, "Mom, I don't even want to hear it, I'm in love and you know it. I was at Jimmy's house, I sucked his dick, then he fucked me in my ass." The mother shaking her head, says, "You're confusing love with lust. Had you let Jimmy fuck you in your ass THEN ...


1 Comments, 60 Views, 97 Votes ,6.75 Score
STILL A VIRGIN!!!   11/29/2003

a young woman was applying for a job and i told her to fill up the application form. on box 3 - sex, she inquired what to answer since she has not experience yet with regards to sex since she though F (for female) means frequent and M (for male) means moderate.


1 Comments, 59 Views, 3 Votes
rm_Oh_Yes_ 48 F
2  Articles
Things you can say at Thanksgiving and get away with in mixed company   11/19/2003

Things you can say on Thanksgiving & get away with..... <br> Talk about a huge breast! Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist. It's Cool Whip time! If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst! Whew, that's one terrific spread! I'm in the mood for a little dark meat. Are you ready for seconds yet? It's just a little dry, do you still want to eat it? Just wait your turn, ...


3 Comments, 192 Views, 56 Votes ,8.52 Score
Zed281 53 C
0  Articles
THE PASTOR AND THE SONUVABITCH   11/13/2003

One day a local man asks the pastor to go fishing with him.Off they go and its not long before the pastor hooks a big one.As their landing it the dude exclaims "look at the size of that of a bitch" Startled, the pastor lets out a grunt of disaproval, the dude quickly covers his ass by explaining thats what kind of fish it is, a "sonuvabitch". The pastor takes the fish back to the church ...


1 Comments, 35 Views, 2 Votes ,2.42 Score
laqui4you 47 M
7  Articles
At The Sperm Bank   11/10/2003

A masked man goes into a sperm bank, points a gun at the woman behind the counter, and says, "Open the safe." She says, "This isn't a real bank, it's a sperm bank." He says, "Open the safe or I'll shoot." She opens the safe, and he says, "Now take one of the bottles and drink it." After she opens the bottle and drinks it, he takes off his mask and the woman realizes the robber is ...


1 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes
laqui4you 47 M
7  Articles
Boy Scouts, Lawyers, And Priests   11/10/2003

Three Boy Scouts, a lawyer, a priest, and a pilot are in a plane that is about to crash. The pilot says "Well, we only have 3 parachutes, let's give them to the 3 Boy Scouts. They are young and have their whole lives in front of them" The lawyer says "Fuck the Boy Scouts!" The priest says, "Do we have time?"


1 Comments, 38 Views, 0 Votes
laqui4you 47 M
7  Articles
A Before And After Scene   11/10/2003

This husband and wife are staying in a hotel, and after a romantic evening wining and dining they go off to bed. However, as soon as they settled down, the man (not quite ready for slumber) leans over and whispers softly, "Hey snuggle boopy boops, your lickle hubby wubby isn't quite ready for bye-byes yet." The wife takes the hint and says, "OK, but I have to use the bathroom first." So ...


1 Comments, 55 Views, 0 Votes
laqui4you 47 M
7  Articles
We Really Can't Win!   11/7/2003

A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid, " she thought as she fell. "What a way to die." As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?" "No!" she shrieked, ...


1 Comments, 41 Views, 63 Votes ,7.10 Score
laqui4you 47 M
7  Articles
Construction Site Sign Language   11/7/2003

There was this construction worker on the 3rd floor of this unfinished building. He needed a hand saw, but was too lazy to go down and get it himself, so he tried to call his fellow worker on the ground to get it for him, but this guy could not hear a word he said. So he started to give a sign so the guy on the ground could understand him. First he pointed at his eyes (meaning "I") then ...


1 Comments, 30 Views, 92 Votes ,7.76 Score
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Advice from the Virgin Mary.   11/7/2003

Next time you come to the supper table with dirty feet, it will be your last Jesus!


1 Comments, 22 Views, 42 Votes
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
unemployment office   10/31/2003

Words from Satan that are not found in the Bible. Cain, the Lord is telling everybody that you are not Able and available for work.


1 Comments, 24 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
Viagra   10/29/2003

An 80 year old man goes to his chemist and asks for 1/4th tablet of viagra. The chemist suggests a higher dosage. the man says no just give me enough so that when I piss i don't wet my shoes


1 Comments, 54 Views, 172 Votes ,4.06 Score
fckmytits 48 F
1  Article
Penguin in the Desert   10/27/2003

A penguin is driving through the desert and his care breaks down. He gets out of the car and starts walking toward the nearest town. On his way he comes across a pay phone and calls a tow truck. The tow truck comes and picks him up and takes him into town. The mechanic tells him it will be a while before his car is fixed and the penguin goes and looks around town. He is walking down ...


3 Comments, 245 Views, 109 Votes ,7.17 Score
4everinluv 61 C
1  Article
Hot Fun in the Shuswap   10/26/2003

If thise joke makes you laugh, Vote on it & earn points. Thx <br> HOT FUN IN THE SHUSWAP <br> >May 30th: >Just moved to THE SUNNY OKANAGAN. NOW THIS IS THE PLACE TO LIVE.. >Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. >What a place! It is beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here. >June 14th: >Really heating up. Got to 100 ...


1 Comments, 82 Views, 50 Votes ,6.11 Score
sensualguy732 59 M
3  Articles
Old lady Joke   10/11/2003

And Old Lady was in a store buying a baseball bat for her grandson. As she was being rung up the clerk asked, "Do you wanna Ball for the Bat?" The Old lady said "No, But I'll blow you for the Skateboard."


1 Comments, 33 Views, 2 Votes ,3.81 Score
Prince_Kakarot 38 M
5  Articles
Little girl   10/6/2003

Q: how do you make a little girl screem twice? A: smack her teddy bear with your bloddy dick?


2 Comments, 16 Views, 5 Votes ,0.53 Score
Prince_Kakarot 38 M
5  Articles
Don't go to this doctor   10/5/2003

A man walks into a doctor's office. He tells the doctor that he's been having problems with his ass. The doctor checks him out. The doctor tells him that he has found something wrong, but there is a cure. He perscripes supositories and shows him how to have them inserted. The man goes home to his wife and tells her all about it. When the time comes to insert the supository, he tells his ...


2 Comments, 71 Views, 126 Votes ,7.64 Score
lesbians   10/2/2003

What do lesbians and mechanics have in common???????They both use snap-on tools


2 Comments, 31 Views, 36 Votes ,4.71 Score
rm_bigticket51 44 M
6  Articles
Phasing out breast reduction   10/1/2003

A guy was looking at his wife undress before they went to bed. <br> she was standing there naked and looked down and said "Iwished my tits were bigger I should get implants". <br> The husband said "You don't need implants you can make them bigger yourself, hold on". <br> He jumped, ran to the bathroom and came back with toilet paper. she said "How will ...


1 Comments, 38 Views, 40 Votes ,3.64 Score
rm_bigticket51 44 M
6  Articles
Your pussy is too big when   10/1/2003

A couple was getting ready to have sex. The wife gave the husband a blow job, and then he started to go down on her. <br> "Damn you got a big pussy" Damn you got a big pussy. <br> She looked down angrily at him and said "You didn't have to say it twice." <br> He said "I didn't."


1 Comments, 92 Views, 98 Votes ,6.82 Score
rm_bigticket51 44 M
6  Articles
True friends   10/1/2003

one day a wife was at home cleaning the house while her husband Bob was out looking for a job. <br> The doorbell rings and she answers it. It is his best friend Larry. <br> Hi she said "what can I do for you?" <br> Larry says "I heard Bob is looking for a job and you guys need money right?" "So I thought you have such a nice pair of tits I would pay $20 ...


1 Comments, 202 Views, 72 Votes ,8.46 Score
rm_bigticket51 44 M
6  Articles
Grandchild helps his Grandparents   10/1/2003

Gramps is sitting on the porch one day watching his grandson play with a worm he found in the yard. <br> Gramps walks over to the boy and says " Joe I'll bet you $5 you can't make that worm go back in his hole." <br> Joe tried and tried but the worm kept curling up. Finally Joe runs into the house and comes back out with a can of hairspray. He holds the worm and sprays ...


1 Comments, 107 Views, 50 Votes ,7.79 Score
voyeurs69in2003 73 C
107  Articles
Viagra variations   9/30/2003

With VIAGRA such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society.. <br> DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent. <br> PROJECTRA - Men given this ...


1 Comments, 54 Views, 7 Votes ,3.04 Score
voyeurs69in2003 73 C
107  Articles
Chocolate better than sex!   9/30/2003

TOP TWENTY REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX: <br> 1 You can GET chocolate. 2 "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate. 3 Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft. 4 You can safely have chocolate while you are driving. 5 You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to. 5 You can have chocolate even in front of your mother. 6 ...


1 Comments, 36 Views, 10 Votes ,3.58 Score
mtrman820 120 M
1  Article
Blond Handiwoman   9/21/2003

A blond handiwoman is going from door to door looking for work. She knocks on a door and a husband and wife answer. She asked if they had any jobs to be done. Husband says "the porch needs painting.....How much?". Blond says fifty dollars.usband says OK....the paint is in the garage. The wife says to the husband "FIFTY DOLLARS??? I don't think she knows how big the porch is!" Husband says ...


1 Comments, 54 Views, 244 Votes ,6.77 Score
voyeurs69in2003 73 C
107  Articles
Chocolate better than Sex   9/2/2003

<br>   <br> TOP TWENTY REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX: <br> 1.   You can GET chocolate. <br> 2.   "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate. <br> 3.   Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft. <br> 4.   You can safely have chocolate while you are driving. <br> 5.   ...


2 Comments, 49 Views, 34 Votes ,6.39 Score
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Golfing Buddies   8/7/2003

How do you know if your behind a group of homo-sexuals on a golf course? When you yell fore they all drop their pants and bend over.


1 Comments, 28 Views, 51 Votes ,0.46 Score
voyeurs69in2003 73 C
107  Articles
Viagra   8/7/2003

1.Man goes to the doctor and asks for a Viagra to make his wife happy. 2.Doctor recommends to take it one hour before an intercourse. 3.Man's wife usually comes from work at 6.PM 4.Man takes Viagra at 5:55 PM 5. Wife calls home at 6PM, to say that she will be home after 10 PM 6. Man calls the doctor asking what to do? 7. Doctor asks: "Don't you have any neighbor to use that Viagra ...


2 Comments, 104 Views, 84 Votes ,6.87 Score
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Bar Bouncer   8/7/2003

How do you know if your in a homo-sexual bar? A bouncer throws you out for farting.


1 Comments, 35 Views, 37 Votes ,0.45 Score
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Physical Examination   8/7/2003

How do you know if your Doctor is a homo-sexual? <br> He drops his pants and coughs.


1 Comments, 38 Views, 36 Votes ,0.91 Score
Hurricane   6/20/2003

Why are women like a hurricane? <br> When they come they make a hell of a racket and when they leave they take the house with them.


1 Comments, 14 Views, 87 Votes ,6.62 Score
zambonidriver96 59 M
4  Articles
Total Rejection   5/28/2003

What is total rejection? <br> Thats when your jerking off and your hand fall asleep....


2 Comments, 80 Views, 93 Votes ,6.80 Score
DDTDB 72 M
6  Articles
Alice limerick   3/31/2003

There once was a lady named Alice Who used a dynamite stick for a phallus They found her vagina In North Carolina And bits of her tits in Dallas


2 Comments, 22 Views, 28 Votes ,4.58 Score
DDTDB 72 M
6  Articles
Fellow from Kent   3/31/2003

There once was a fellow from Kent Whose dick was so long that it bent To save himself trouble He put it in double So instead of cumming he went!


3 Comments, 33 Views, 18 Votes ,2.85 Score
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Gates   3/25/2003

"the Rich" <br> come to gates wreaking of wealth. Peter enters choking out the words, "smells like dirty laundry". NO, that is impossible, I've always had the finest or should I say, the cleaniness goods. Peter replies, slow down boy, I was just needling.


1 Comments, 44 Views, 26 Votes
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Gates   3/25/2003

<br> Musician:come to gates ringing the bell. Peter:"don't do that, it's not time to eat, besides, we don't want the angels to hear you". Musician play that bad? Peter:"that bad, you were killing them down there, man"!


1 Comments, 47 Views, 18 Votes
rdhair44 65 M
98  Articles
Gates   3/25/2003

<br> <br> <br> <br> Minister:comes to the gates calling out, "anybody home"? Peter:"nobody home, come back after the mail arrives". Minister:when the mail arrives? Peter:"yes, when the mail arrives"? Minister no, let me explain? Peter:"send your explanation to the Lord, you can ...


1 Comments, 27 Views, 16 Votes
Gotta take a shit first   3/19/2003

A man is on a flight from Toronto to Los Angeles. As they take off, the captain comes on the P.A. system and says "This is your captain John Smith speaking. I'd like to take the time to thank you for flying Air Canada, flight 666 from Toronto to Los Angeles. We will be flying at 35, 000 feet with an air speed of 650 miles per hour. If any of you have further questions about the flight, just ...


1 Comments, 233 Views, 64 Votes ,6.99 Score
MEN & WOMEN   3/17/2003

Why do MEN walk more and WOMEN talk more ??????? GUESS???? GUESS WHY ????? It is realy easy !!!!! Because MEN have THREE legs and WOMEN have FOUR lips.


1 Comments, 57 Views, 48 Votes ,4.62 Score
rm_doyoutoo2 52 M
1  Article
Nuns Vacation   3/15/2003

Three nuns preparing for an outside mission were told by the preist that they must first purify themselves if they had touched any private parts of a man by washing their hands in the holy water. The first shyly walked up and washed her fingers in the water and said "it was just once" the preist asked the second to proceed when all of the sudden the third pushed her out of the way and ran ...


1 Comments, 61 Views, 41 Votes ,7.00 Score
DDTDB 72 M
6  Articles
First Blow Job   3/14/2003

Fellow walks into a bar, sits down and demands of the bartender, " Joe, gimme two shots of Jack Daniels." Joe pours the shots and the customer drinks them. "Joe, gimme two more shots, and hurry!" Joe pours two more and says, "Gee, Tom you usually only drink beer." Tom replies, "Yeah, that's right but I need two more shots. FAST!!" Joe pours the next two and asks, " Well why the ...


1 Comments, 47 Views, 67 Votes ,4.86 Score
teddy bears   3/12/2003

An attractive woman is sitting in a bar when she sees a man she just has to meet. She signals the waitress and buys him a beer. The man joins her and they start talking. One thing leads to another and the next thing she knows she is in his apartment and things are getting steamy. They head for the bedroom and she gets the shock of her life. The room is FILLED with teddy bears. Big ...


1 Comments, 52 Views, 29 Votes ,6.05 Score
worms   3/11/2003

Little Tommy was playing with an earthworm in the back of his grandparents' house. Grandpa comes out and watches him for a while. Then he says, "Tommy, I bet ya five dollars you can't get that worm to go back in the hole." Tommy thinks for a minute, then goes in to the house. He comes out a minute later with Grandma's hairspray. He holds the worm by one end, sprays it with hairspray, ...


1 Comments, 41 Views, 16 Votes ,4.30 Score
understanding women   3/11/2003

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island, and walks the beach every morining to see is anything useful has washed up. One morning he finds a lamp. He figures what the hell, and sure enough, when he rubs it out pops the genie. "I will grant your wish, oh Master", says the genie. The man thinks for a bit, then says, "Ya know, I have been here for a couple of years, and this island is not ...


1 Comments, 66 Views, 52 Votes ,8.41 Score
two drunks   3/9/2003

two drunks are sitting outside of a bar without the price of a drink between them. one has an idea..."lets get a hotdog, i will put it down my pants, and when the bartender tells us the price, you drop to your knees, pull out the hotdog, and pretend to give me a blowjob. we'll get thrown out for queers!" the other drunk agrees and they go to the first bar. the first drunk orders two ...


1 Comments, 42 Views, 26 Votes ,5.61 Score
rm_us2r4real2 53 C
0  Articles
Truck Driver   3/7/2003

A truck driver walked into a house in Vegas , he put $1000.00 down and told the madam he wanted a meanest, nastyest fatest , in the place, the madan said mister for a thousand you can have the best looking woman in the house, he said mam you dont understand im not horny im homesick!!


1 Comments, 97 Views, 87 Votes ,7.26 Score
taxidermist   2/24/2003

There was a taxidermist who was the only survivor of a plane crash in the midddle of the Australian outback. He wandered for days, with no food or water to sustain him. Finally, by chance, he came upon a pub in the middle of nowhere. He runs in and orders a tall glass of milk. The guys all look at him and one growls, "Milk...what kind of drink is that for a man. Just what in the hell ...


1 Comments, 58 Views, 10 Votes ,4.78 Score
wolf56il 67 M
2  Articles
High wires and old women   2/4/2003

On one side of the world there is a man walking on a tightrope over a 4, 000 ft. deep gorge. At the same time on the other side of the world, a man is getting a blowjob from an 85 year old woman with no teeth. What is going through both of their minds at the same time? <br> DON'T LOOK DOWN !!!!!


1 Comments, 77 Views, 43 Votes ,5.96 Score
rm_davemidlands 67 M
1  Article
An Ostrich and a Cat   2/4/2003

A guy, an ostrich and a cat go into a bar. The guy says to the barman 'I'll have a pint of Guiness please' The ostrich says 'I'll have the same please' and the cat says 'I'll have a whisky, but I'm not paying'. So they get their drinks and the man pulls out the exact money to pay for them. The next week, the same trio go into the bar. The man says 'I'll have a brandy', the ostrich says ...


1 Comments, 58 Views, 58 Votes ,6.58 Score
Old Boat!   1/16/2003

Once there were two twins, Joe and John. Joe was the owner of a dilapidated old boat. It so happened that John's wife died the same day that Joe's boat sank. <br> A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Joe a mistook him for John. She said, 'I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible.' <br> Joe thinking that she was talking about his boat, ...


1 Comments, 59 Views, 140 Votes ,8.05 Score
funtime24sexxx 40 C
1  Article
eggs   12/20/2002

A couple was celebrateing their 60th wedding aniversity and they are having dinner and talking about their life with each other over the years when the husband asked, I have always wondered what you keep in the hope chest that you got at our wedding I have never seen whats in it.The wife says no problem I'll show you. So they go into the bedroom and she unlocks the chest and opens it up. ...


5 Comments, 136 Views, 127 Votes ,7.22 Score
Dickhed 70 M
1  Article
Another Limerick   11/30/2002

On Saturn the sexes are three Which is quite awkward you'll agree To perform Con Brio It requires a Trio and it even takes two for a pee


2 Comments, 27 Views, 43 Votes
POKER VIBRATOR PHONE   11/8/2002

A GUY PICKED UP HOME SOME CHICKS FOR THREESOME.WHILST THEY WEREIN SESSION HIS MOBILE PHONE STARTED RINGING AND INTERRUPTING HIS FUN GAME SO HE SET TO VIBRATOR LEVEL5.AFTER HE FINISHED WITH THESE GIRLS ONE OF JUST PICKED HAND SET WRAPPED A CONDOM SHEE ROUND IT AND INSERTED IT INTO HER CUNT.THE GUY MADE A FRANTIC EFFORT TO TRACE THE CULPRIT AND THEY ALL READILY ALLOWED HIM TO SEARCH THEM ...


2 Comments, 42 Views, 91 Votes
Secret-romance 67 M
7  Articles
Shemale golfer   10/25/2002

Why a shemale golfer refuse to play with any male golfer? Ans....She already have two balls of her own to play with ahd can get a hole-in-one anytime she like!!


2 Comments, 76 Views, 50 Votes
rotn2dacore 69 M
11  Articles
3 Mice   9/28/2002

3 mice were in a bar, drinking and bragging about how tough they were. After downing a shot of bourbon and slamming the glass on the bar, the 1st mouse said:"When I see a mousetrap, I lay on my back, set it off with my foot, catch the bar in my teeth, bench press it 30 times to build up an appetite, then snatch the cheese and eat it". The 2nd mouse, after downing 2 shots of tequila and ...


2 Comments, 71 Views, 178 Votes ,8.17 Score
Why women don't fart   6/29/2002

Women don't fart because they can't keep their mouth shut long enough to build up pressure.


5 Comments, 42 Views, 626 Votes ,7.32 Score
God and Eve   5/27/2002

One day Eve was washing her beaver in the river, when all of a sudden God spoke down to Eve and said ?Eve you shouldn?t be washing in that river I will never be able to get the smell out of those fish.


4 Comments, 60 Views, 34 Votes ,2.97 Score
seekin4snatch 56 M
1  Article
Island Fun   1/17/2002

I have always been a bit of an exhibitionist, but my wife is very shy about showing her body. In general, I do not think she even wants to see herself naked. However, when she has been drinking a lot, this changes. She still does not want others to see her naked, but she takes a lot more risks. For example, it is not unusual for me to talk her out of all of her clothes on a ride home from ...


4 Comments, 273 Views, 87 Votes ,8.67 Score
KRUJAR 69 M
2  Articles
MASTURBATING BULL   9/26/2000

Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A BULL THAT MASTURBATES? <br> A: BEEF STROGANOFF!


3 Comments, 84 Views, 7 Votes ,5.84 Score
Do you want fries with that?   9/11/2000

What do you call a 300 pound woman with a yeast infection? <br> A: A Whopper with cheese!


3 Comments, 44 Views, 12 Votes
SexPist01 61 M
1  Article
ATM Dancer   9/7/2000

So the other day, my friends and I went to this "Ladies Night Club". <br> One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulls out a $10 bill. The "dancer" came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and put it on his butt cheek. <br> Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a $20 bill. She calls the guy back over, licks the $20 bill and puts it on his ...


3 Comments, 92 Views, 58 Votes
Who wants to be a millionaire?   8/23/2000

The man asks the wife if he can have some. She says no. He asks if that is her final answer. She says yes. He asks if he can call a friend!!


3 Comments, 57 Views, 4 Votes ,2.08 Score
12do69l8r 61 M
2  Articles
threes guys and a mormon   5/4/2000

Three guys and a mormon were standing around talking one day and the first guy says , "I have 4 , one more and I'll have a basketball team," the second guy says so.. "I have 8 , one more and I'll have a baseball team,".. The third guy says, "SO I have 11 , one more and I'll have a footbal team"... The mormon laughing says thats nothing.."I've got 17 wives, one more and I'll have a ...


3 Comments, 134 Views, 3 Votes ,2.45 Score
12do69l8r 61 M
2  Articles
2 lawyers in a bar   5/4/2000

Two lawyers were in a bar during happy hour sharing a beer, when this sexy/shapley blond walks by, the first lawyer says to his friend, "I'd love to fuck her" the second turns and says "really, outa what?"


3 Comments, 136 Views, 3 Votes ,3.43 Score
Sex on the Schedule   4/20/2000

A married couple went to see a cousilor due to an unhappy relationship in the past two months. After listening each of them complain about their personal lifestyles he asked them if they even having a "sexual relationship". They both agreed that the sex part of it is good although it's difficult to schedule a particualar time between their work schedules. The counsilor was flabbergasted ...


4 Comments, 176 Views, 5 Votes ,3.47 Score
ANONGUEST 48 M
1  Article
freeride   12/13/1999

Two fleas are scheduled to meet in Miami once winter hits. One arrives weeks before the other, and once the second arrives he is hypothermic and near dead. The second flea sees the first so comfortable and asks how he did it, the first replies that he simply crawls up a stewardess's dress and waits where it is nice and warm, and suggests that the other flea try the same. So the next year the ...


3 Comments, 183 Views, 9 Votes ,1.93 Score
rm_icmguy 43 M
1  Article
How was Colonel Sanders a typical male?   12/3/1999

How was Colonel Sanders a typical male? All he cared about were legs, breasts, and thighs.


1 Comments, 29 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
Two little boys   10/17/1999

Joey and Timmy meet in the hospital ward prior to surgery. Timmy is obviously nervous, so Joey asks, "Are you alright?" "I'm getting my tonsils out and I'm kinda scared, " said Timmy. Oh, I had my tonsils out last year. You'll just have a sore throat. Then they'll bring you ice cream!" said Joey. "Oh, I guess that's ok 'cause I like ice cream. What are you here for?" "I'm having a ...


1 Comments, 74 Views, 0 Votes
ANONGUEST 47 M
2  Articles
Jokes for U   6/23/1999

Joke#1 An old man went to his doctor and complained that he had toilet problems 'Well, let's see', said the doctor,'How is your urination?' 'Every morning at seven o'clock on the dot'. 'Good. How about your bowel movements ? ' 'Eight o'clock each morning as regular as could be' 'So what's the problem?' asked the Doctor. 'I don't wake up until nine!' Joke#2 A big game hunter was engaged by a ...


3 Comments, 139 Views, 3 Votes ,2.45 Score
ANONGUEST 47 M
2  Articles
Lord Shiva's wish ( Love automation )   6/23/1999

Lord Shiva granted Manu a wish. Manu : I want my penis to increase/ decrease in size as per my wish. Lord Shiva : Ok. If you clap your hands the size of your penis will increase. Manu : But I also wish to decrease it's size when required. Lord : Don't worry if you snap your fingers the size will decrease. Manu : Thank you ,lord. One day,Manu left his home to visit his friend Raja. On his way he ...


3 Comments, 124 Views, 4 Votes ,0.14 Score
ANONGUEST 47 M
2  Articles
Walking Lane   6/23/1999

Lord Shiva was waiting at the door to heaven. He was to decide posting's of candidates based on their merit. Merit Criteria : 1. If a candidate was faithful to his/her spouse, he/she was given a "Mercedes Benz" to enjoy his life in heaven. 2. If a candidate had engaged in sex with a neighbour he/she was given a "Two-wheeler" to enjoy his life in heaven. 3. If a candidate had engaged in ...


3 Comments, 126 Views, 4 Votes ,2.08 Score